for Pâro3/20/2011 c1 
612simpleplan13
I really like the tone you set here with your word choices and formatting. Very serious and sad.
"Memories that once were— faded like ashes blown."... I like that line a lot. It's a great description and the phrasing worked really well too.
I also liked the ending because it sort of changes this piece from a bad dream to a reality that I think a lot of us can relate to. Great piece.
PS Check out the Review Game and/or its Review Marathon (links in my profile)
612simpleplan13I really like the tone you set here with your word choices and formatting. Very serious and sad.
"Memories that once were— faded like ashes blown."... I like that line a lot. It's a great description and the phrasing worked really well too.
I also liked the ending because it sort of changes this piece from a bad dream to a reality that I think a lot of us can relate to. Great piece.
PS Check out the Review Game and/or its Review Marathon (links in my profile)
3/19/2011 c1 2dragonflydreamer
I love the role time plays in this. It's only mentioned once, but it lingers through the whole piece. Interesting manipulation of the meaning.
I also like the format. It's appealing visually, plus the way the line and stanza breaks were placed had good control over the way this is read.
~Sparkles from the Review Marathon (link in profile)
2dragonflydreamerI love the role time plays in this. It's only mentioned once, but it lingers through the whole piece. Interesting manipulation of the meaning.
I also like the format. It's appealing visually, plus the way the line and stanza breaks were placed had good control over the way this is read.
~Sparkles from the Review Marathon (link in profile)
3/19/2011 c1 287Archia
It's odd how such a thing as changing shoes can mean so much. I had a friend who moved schools and I never got to say goodbye, I felt something like what you said. Well sone.
287ArchiaIt's odd how such a thing as changing shoes can mean so much. I had a friend who moved schools and I never got to say goodbye, I felt something like what you said. Well sone.
3/19/2011 c1 11ContemplativeJoyce
I really liked the beginning of this poem (the first two lines). The end was good too, but not as good as the beginning.
11ContemplativeJoyceI really liked the beginning of this poem (the first two lines). The end was good too, but not as good as the beginning.