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for Grow Dark

2/29/2012 c1 171theycallmetalljake
It's just so pretty, remorseful and pure. Amazingness.
10/30/2011 c1 Zaffre Magpie
That person's life seems so gloomy and dark. I liked the repetition :)
7/16/2011 c1 70Reel Wander
The world/life looks so gloomy and dark,

hope seems a distant away,

even the speck of life, means nothing,

trampled youth,

age of wisdom gone away
4/22/2011 c1 15Ice Bubble
Such imagery!

Very good! :)
4/20/2011 c1 51ruffad
Thought I'd stop by and return the favor of a review! :) I like how you took a simple whim to watch darkness befall and turn it into a motion picture of why the narrator would ever think death was near. "The wind throws deadened leaves"-could this be symbolic? that the narrator has given up on holding onto life just as those "deadened leaves"? For it sounds like the narrator has grown cynic of a world that's moving too fast, paving more roads and lighting up more lamps. The cars that "fly past with zooming sounds" disturb her peace on the bench. The flicker of lights "ruin the beauty of the night". These all act as reminders of how real beauty is escaping this world. At the beginning of this review, I reflected on why the narrator thought of death. The title is very suitable for the ideas you are trying to convey. The world can be viewed as eclipsing in darkness as industries are raised from the earth and scrape the sky. "I wanted to watch the skies grow dark just once before I die" echoes throughout the poem of the narrator's wish to see the world come to an end as it should, with night's blanket being cast over head.
4/20/2011 c1 5Whirlymerle
[That I trample under me] I’m not sure if trample is the right word when you’re talking about the road.

I like the repetition with “I want to watch the sky grow dark”.

Wow! The ending was absolutely chilling. Even though you foreshadowed it with “before I was dead” I didn’t see it at all. Great poem and commentary on crime.

~Merle

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