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8/13/2011 c1 276Darkest Fantasy
Ohhgoodness. Heartbreaking much?

I got goosebumps after reading this:

"Frozen, petrified with terror only a mother about to lose a child could feel, I stared.

I stared as she struggled to regain her footing.

I stared as she looked me in the eye, fear in her gaze."

I might not have given birth, but I know that fear. I'm my siblings' second mother, and I have a mother's instinct. And that fear, when there's even the most remote possibility that you could lose them, takes you over completely.

I think you did a great job capturing the innocence and sweet, simple thoughts of a child.

Thanks for the read. Good job
8/13/2011 c1 13Irish Eyes 63
Oh my lanta was that good.

I thought that little girl's thoughts were amazingly written and the mother's POV was also fantastic. The wow factor wouldn't have been as intense without her perspective. I was tearing up at the end.

I like how you took the cliche saying 'the sky's the limit' and turned it upside down, making it so literal and figurative at the same time. I thought it was gorgeous when she took her mother's words so seriously and ended up above the sky and in the sky, all around the sky.

Verrrrry good :]
8/12/2011 c1 9katienicolebby
Aw, I absolutely loved it...so beautiful, well-written, and very sad :( job well done!
7/22/2011 c1 6LeenMariexoxo
That was the most beautiful thing I have ever read in my life! I am crying so much right now. I love that story. Please continue to write.
7/22/2011 c1 1FallingIntoSections
Beautiful and sad... :)
7/21/2011 c1 Silver Sparke
Aww! That was so sad and touching and amazing all at once! I loved the way you chose to make it from a young person's point of view because it gave it that innocence and made you feel for Mallory and her mother.

However, for some reason, the mother's thoughts didn't come across as well. I didn't enjoy them as much as Mallory's, because I wanted to just keep reading this sweet girl's innocent thoughts. The mother's thoughts were necessary, but maybe it's just me, but something didn't feel right about them. But great job! Keep it up! I enjoyed this one a lot.

~Silver Sparke

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