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8/11/2013 c1 xxxyx
This poem here is broken into lines much more... um, cleanly than its predecessors, meaning that you've improved, and it was a great improvement.

It has a rhythm, I give you that. The feeling of stepping forward, and sometimes falling, while determination drives the persona on. Good job there.
11/18/2012 c1 70Naver
I like the simile in the last line. :)
Continue, I'm glad your happy..
1/10/2012 c1 SarahTheTrainer
Oooh I like the last line! Reminded me of Gaara-kun from Naruto/Naruto:Shippuden!
10/12/2011 c1 6CelticX
Again you make me think. Darn you! I like the imagery that you used, mainly the vision of sand slipping through desperate fingers. I hope that you can hold onto that happiness this time.

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