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for The Gamekeeper's Secret

10/18/2012 c5 Cecilia A
I love your writing, I just wish that this would move along a bit faster! I keep forgetting things. :P

Oh well. I can't really hurry you, cause I'm not one to talk.

BUT I LOVE IT SO MUCH.
8/21/2012 c4 Cecilia A
Sorry I've neglected this for so long; I forgot how much I liked it. :) Hope to see another chapter soon.

-Cecilia
7/1/2012 c4 10Ardina Falconhurst
This is great! You're giving just enough to cause immense curiosity, I sure hope your next update is soon! The way you write is wonderful. I can see everything you describe and even what you don't describe in great detail. The mystery of this lil sprite is starting to get to me...I want to know what and who she is...what is the secret the Gamekeeper's keeping? Also I find it interesting that Liam has continued thinking about her.
Thanks for the new chapter and keep em coming! :)
Pepper
6/7/2012 c3 Cecilia A
I really wish you'd keep this up; it's quite good.

-Cecilia
6/6/2012 c2 Cecilia A
Interesting, and very realistic.

-Cecilia
6/6/2012 c1 Cecilia A
Usually I'm not big on historical fiction, but this is good. You have a couple minor issues with grammar and structure, but other than that no convention issues.

-Cecilia
11/29/2011 c3 Ardina Falconhurst
I'm falling more and more in love with your story! It's beautifully written, it's drawing me in with every sentence, and it's a great tale! The time period you're writing in can be a tough one and you're making it look easy, all of your phrases seem to fit right in. I can't wait to read more! Sorry I didn't read this one sooner...Thanksgiving and preparing for finals is getting to me. I do hope though that you have plenty of free time, so that I might read new chapters quickly...but I'm probably asking too much. ;)

I love how you mention Ellie's eyes...bright sapphire...it grabs me every time. It's my favorite.

I feel like the ending to this chapter (3) is not only sad but ominous...I feel like something's going to happen to poor Ellie because you mentioned how no harm had come to her for a year. I do hope nothing bad happens, I mean she lost her mom, that's bad enough.

In chapter 2 I was captivated by your descriptions of the ships and the men and the battle. It was great, though I feel like a few descriptions of the sea (waves, salty air, breeze, something) would have made it even better. Made me, or any reader, see the scene clearer, feel like we were there. Hope you find this useful! :)

Keep up your awesome work! Looking forward to Chapter 4!

~Pepper
11/27/2011 c3 Mishazstories
I found this very well-written (as usual) only a couple of typos. It was very intriguing how the duchess took an interest in Ellie. I am happy that she will have some sort of female guidance. The description of the duchess seeing Ellie with the fox was fantastic! One thing...i know it's not that important probably but you mentioned that her mother had cancer...what type exactly? There was an older name for a tumor of the eyelid that makes hair fall out and they called it"deplumation." I'm guessing that would lead to death as well if it became benign. Though deplumation in itself means "to deprive of feathers or pluck." lol I know how random this must seem but I just thought I would throw it out there if you wanted to use an older name for "cancer."
11/27/2011 c2 Mishazstories
Very good chapter. You gave me a clear visual into the war scene and I could even see how Liam Holloway appears now, I can see how much he's grown. I like how you didn't rush him into manhood though(because I don't see that yet) He still has a lot of youthfulness to him and naivety, and the last bit about Elli's mother... (I'm assuming) I like how you are setting that up as well. Can't wait to read more and I'm on to the next chapter :)
11/10/2011 c1 Ardina Falconhurst
I looove this story :) I rather like this little wood sprite and the arrogant boy. Your descriptions and dialogue are very well written. I like the mystery around the little Elli, how even her own mother wonders how she looks the way she does when neither her nor her husband look that way. I'd love to read more of this story. :) Keep up the great work!

~Pepper
11/4/2011 c1 1SingingBird812
This seems really interesting! I hope there will be more soon :)
11/1/2011 c1 Mishazstories
This is a really good 1st chapter! :) I like it a lot! One thing you may want to consider is the sentence -"Relax, Cutter. I didn't call you here to 'sack' you, as your daughter suggested." She didn't suggest that he should do that, rather, she feared that he would do that.

One other small thing is ..."The hens did good today," she pronounced happily, her basket held up in pride. "Twelve eggs today!"

Saying "today" twice so close together is a bit redundant. She could say "The hens did good today," she pronounced happily, holding her basket up in pride. "Twelve eggs!"

Or "The hens did good," she pronounced happily, holding her basket up in pride. "Twelve eggs today."

I really like this story so far and hope you post another chapter soon!
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