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9/29/2012 c15 1starlight91
I really like the interactions between Petra and Maxima as well, that bit of sisterly relationship that I can relate to. I feel like Everett is just giving her a taste of her own medicine...? It's good to see their feelings gradually develop. I think Maxima is starting to care about Everett more than she realizes. And Jada finally shows her face :) I think you're doing quite well. Look forward to upcoming chapters.
9/29/2012 c1 6Cazie
Nice! I like it so far.
9/29/2012 c13 passing through
Only doing this review because I feel that you don't credit yourself enough. People don't need to review in order for you to feel your writing is of worth. It's good stop wanting people's acceptance via reviews. I hope you carry on if people do or don't review it'd be a shame if you did stop. Also why did you chose the namemaxima
9/28/2012 c14 1starlight91
I like how you're alternating different viewpoints. It's interesting to see their different thoughts and perspectives as their relationship develops. The interactions are really cute haha. It's different to see Everett acting this way, since throughout most of the story so far we've always seen him all serious and business-like. There was a lot of dialogue in this chapter, and there seemed to be less inner thoughts shown. However, still a great job overall! :)
9/28/2012 c14 Confidence from the Night
Ah! Awkward moments. So much fun.
Okay, I really really like Everett's POVs.
Can't wait for the next update!
9/28/2012 c14 1funnechick
I really don't mean to be a downer again, but I kind of miss the Maxima that was really fiery, like in the beginning. I would love to see some of that again.

But I did love when Everett made her sit in his lap. Greatness. I can't wait to see what else the day has in store. (Oh, and I really liked the part when Maxima couldn't decide what to wear and asked the driver. He was so sweet.)
9/28/2012 c14 w3ardo
didnt think shed be that excited, and everett mustve been thrilled about the picture
9/28/2012 c14 whiteyachts
as soon as i saw that you'd posted a new chapter last night, i dropped everything to devour it. but i was left wanting more. i re-read it again today to see if i missed something in case i was just caught up in my enthusiasm, but the chapter felt a little on the weaker side. i hope my word choice isn't offensive, i just feel from what i've already read that your characters deserve more and you're definitely a good enough writer to give it to them.

i found it a little odd that maxima was stressing more over what to wear to the wine tour than the fact that she was going on a trip (is it a weekend trip or a one day trip?) with her boss/old classmate who up to this point she's had questionable feelings for and hasn't really divulged anything in her POV about her feelings towards him and if they're changing (i don't think), so i wonder what she's REALLY thinking about going on this excursion with him. it would have been nice to see more of that inner monologue while she was getting ready and anticipating what the day would hold.

i thought the interactions between them on the bus with each taking a turn playing magician was cute & i loved the idea of them trying out tricks on one another that i'm supposing was to allow them to joke with/touch/relax around each other. it felt like the interactions were still missing something, especially if i think back to their lunch date on the park bench with everett's homemade sandwich. there was a lot more meat to their interaction in that scene and what it brought out about their personalities but we didn't really end up learning much more about either one of them on the bus. i found it pretty surprising that everett enjoys magic when he comes across as a really professional, serious businessman & lawyer with a fancy car & condo & wine opener, yet he has this creative and interesting hobby/talent. i'm surprised maxima's comment about him bringing magic tricks didn't really lead anywhere when it would have been a good chance to delve a little deeper into another side of his character.

i hope this is helpful and comes across as constructive, i just wanted to express how this chapter felt to me as a reader. i still wholeheartedly love this story and supports the work you are putting into it! i'm looking forward to seeing what the rest of the wine tour has to offer! :)
9/28/2012 c14 Hope
Aww love it
9/28/2012 c14 mylittleprincess
awesome! more please.
9/27/2012 c14 Guest
I am really looking forward to see what more the wine tour has in store for them... :-) Great chapter!
9/27/2012 c14 heal me forever
i enjoyed deir ride it was freaking GOOD :) last photo was chessy ;) ha ha

update soon :)
9/24/2012 c13 Hope
Love this story
9/24/2012 c13 Guest
Wonderful story! I'm loving it so far. I just read it all in one go, and I love it. Your writing is witty and fun and the story is just beautiful so far. Can't wait for more! :-)
9/23/2012 c13 W3ardo
Oh so he's going to go and not rig a lotto for her to win?
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