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10/16/2012 c17 Lilylovestosmile
I just read through your entire story it was that addictive. The characters are complex, as is their relationship. I appreciate that you didn't throw them together within the first ten chapters. There are some minor grammatical errors where spell check didn't catch it probably. I hope you continue on with the story, I want to see how it ends. I would leave a much more detailed review but I'm on a phone! Good luck with writing!
10/16/2012 c17 7feminista
It's very well written. Máxima's reaction to the kiss was a bit odd, though. You would think that a character as emotional as her would have a bit more of a reaction to both the kiss and the cold shoulder if she cried over her first day at work and because she remembered something he had said to her a few years ago. But I like how she confronts him, its always soo entertaining! I almost wish you would play up their shared history a bit more so we can get a better understanding of where they're coming from (and why he's freaking out about her waaay more than she's freaking out about him). Also, I can't wait for her mom to find out! That will be soo much fun! Keep up the good work!
10/16/2012 c17 1LatinSpice
I'm very sorry for your loss. No one likes to go through that sort of pain. But I hope you can find peace in these scriptures John 5:28, 20 and Revelation 21:4. I hope you feel better
Now about the story... loving it! I am anxious to see what's going to happen next!
10/15/2012 c17 whiteyachts
oh man, these two! i felt a little more enlightened about what was going on after reading your note that everett was being so cold because he is hurt... seems like that happens a lot between them! they have a hard time understanding each other! so glad you felt like writing and updating for us, i'll be eagerly awaiting the next chapter.
10/15/2012 c17 mylittleprincess
update soon.
10/15/2012 c17 1funnechick
She is so obtuse...and he is such a jerk. I hope they figure things out soon.

Whether or not I'm liking the characters right now, I still love the story! :)
10/15/2012 c17 heal me forever
arrey ..she shuld have not said dat dat kiss meant ntg bcoz it deffo meant for everett :( anyway filler tha its ok ..
update soon
10/14/2012 c2 Can't wait
Hi, I can't wait to read more! Good character development - if it was a book I wouldn't put it down! Thanks!
10/14/2012 c16 4Pascale Kowai KV
I'm late reviewing again...
First, I'm very sorry for your loss. Take all the time you need to recover from it. I know that I won't find any word to ease your pain, but I can tell you that I will be waiting for you to come back.
As for the story, I can't help to find this chapter extraordinarily warming; not only because it seems like a big turn with this kiss but also because Maxima finally really wants to get more than along with Everett. I liked how she ended up inviting him to her friend's party. And Lorraine made me chuckle at the end.
10/6/2012 c16 3WritingKnightmare
I'm sorry about your friend. I don't know what to say after that. I suppose you just have to take your time and write what you can when you can.

Other than that, I enjoyed reading your story. Well written and not incredibly cliché. That's what I find when reading summaries on fictionpress, it's either badly written, ridden with typos and grammar mistakes or extremely cliché. Yours is quite fantastic. So well done in fact that I find the chapters too short and I want more.

Feel better soon.
10/6/2012 c13 sue
i think the story i great
10/3/2012 c16 1delicate-in-gold-and-green
As I said before, I'm totally hooked on this story. And this latest chapter even got me emotional! (not many stories manage that) you're righting is excellent, it really works and gets the reader feeling connected with the characters which is why I was affected by it so easily. You've done a great job so far.
I'm really sorry to hear about your friend. Truly.
I sincerely hope you are feeling better soon, I can only imagine what you must be going through. I'm sorry if bringing this up in a review is the wrong thing to do. I don't want to cause any bad feelings to return to you at all, that is in no way my intention. My intention was to review your story honestly and with the promise that I will review every chapter too. And not out of pity or anything, I truly believe your story and writing deserves it. Thank you for this story. And even if your decide not to continue, I have thoroughly enjoyed reading it. It's actually the first piece of fiction that I've become addicted to reading.
Sorry for such a long review.
10/2/2012 c16 1funnechick
I am so sorry for your loss. But isn't it amazing to know that your friend is in a much better place than the crazy world we live in.

About the chapter, I loved that we got to see a little fire between them. Everett is a little too good at giving a person space. And Maxima really let that disagreement about his money get out of control. But it was definitely all worth it for that kiss. :)
10/2/2012 c16 w3ardo
awww. i hope you get through it, you can do it. and its ok to take a break because youve updated alot recently and eventhough this is a sort of cliff hanger, im satisfied and you provided a reason.

so yeah, doing good so far and i hope you feel better!
ps, remember to smile, it always makes me feel better when im sad :) :D
10/2/2012 c16 whiteyachts
i am so, so saddened to hear about your loss. this chapter was so fantastic and i thought it was much more in line with what you've written so far and i was so looking forward to sharing my excitement about this chapter with you, but now that seems a little trivial as you're dealing with more palpable emotions in your own real life. you were really gracious to provide us with so many updates this past week and i'm glad that you left things as you did (so good).

my only question, if you feel up to responding it, is about the last statement from everett and why he wanted to pass max's contact information on to his mom just because she wanted to meet her. i can't quite figure that out.

take good care!
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