for Fallen4/15/2012 c2 
11MentalBrink
This has a fluid start and fair character development, and although it's shortness hinders it a bit I like it :)
11MentalBrinkThis has a fluid start and fair character development, and although it's shortness hinders it a bit I like it :)
4/12/2012 c2 Punslinger
Nice chapter. The characters are shaping up well.
(A short review for a short chapter.)
Nice chapter. The characters are shaping up well.
(A short review for a short chapter.)
4/5/2012 c1 Punslinger
This is a very good introductory chapter. You've set up the characters and plot clearly enough to make readers want to learn what will happen next. I wonder what part Shaya's fascination with magik will play in the story?
This is a very good introductory chapter. You've set up the characters and plot clearly enough to make readers want to learn what will happen next. I wonder what part Shaya's fascination with magik will play in the story?