for Guilt6/13/2012 c1 
12ahorizonforthenewbirds
To start, I'll say I liked it. The theme is nice and I love the repetition of the line "falling down, so far down". It adds a nice, song-like feel to the poem. However I think it would've been better if it was broken into different verses, like from "All in black" to "sobbing as he's brought" could be one, then "looking over" to "hiding all the sin" could be another. Apart from that, I really enjoyed the poem. It's great! I also loved the last verse, and the spin on the line "falling down".
12ahorizonforthenewbirdsTo start, I'll say I liked it. The theme is nice and I love the repetition of the line "falling down, so far down". It adds a nice, song-like feel to the poem. However I think it would've been better if it was broken into different verses, like from "All in black" to "sobbing as he's brought" could be one, then "looking over" to "hiding all the sin" could be another. Apart from that, I really enjoyed the poem. It's great! I also loved the last verse, and the spin on the line "falling down".