for The Catch8/11/2012 c20 
1TheArtsAddict
Wow. Just. Wow. The authenticity of the past few chapters (I think 15-20) is remarkable. I really only had one thing to say that I thought would cover all five chapters so I'm making it one review. The flow between chapters is perfect, so is the switch between Callum and Stephanie, it feels really natural. Truly a beautiful story and well developed characters.
1TheArtsAddictWow. Just. Wow. The authenticity of the past few chapters (I think 15-20) is remarkable. I really only had one thing to say that I thought would cover all five chapters so I'm making it one review. The flow between chapters is perfect, so is the switch between Callum and Stephanie, it feels really natural. Truly a beautiful story and well developed characters.
8/1/2012 c20 6deadkitty1
Aw Sweet! :) I like how Callum explained how he was miserable before he met her. It really gave some depth into his character. It's a really cute story and I'm happy you finished it!
6deadkitty1Aw Sweet! :) I like how Callum explained how he was miserable before he met her. It really gave some depth into his character. It's a really cute story and I'm happy you finished it!
7/30/2012 c1 Just crazy for me
Gosh!
I just love the ending!
It's the best example of a cliffhanger I have seen!
Keep it up!
:-)
Gosh!
I just love the ending!
It's the best example of a cliffhanger I have seen!
Keep it up!
:-)
7/30/2012 c20 El- Dogzzz
I love this last chapter! The way you intertwine their lives so much in a more serious way with the moving in is brilliant, yet you still keep the playfulness in their relationship which is really good. Another great story, well done :)
I love this last chapter! The way you intertwine their lives so much in a more serious way with the moving in is brilliant, yet you still keep the playfulness in their relationship which is really good. Another great story, well done :)
7/24/2012 c18 deadkitty1
Aw I like the cute scenes coming on towards the end with Stephanie opening up and Callum learning to care for that one special person. It's so cute and fluffy! I love it!
In the first chapter when you introduced her, I thought Stephanie was much more younger like in her teens because of how young she sounded. But as the chapters progressed, she has matured with some innocence still lingering in her nature. I thought Callum would have a hard time cracking her bubble especially since Johanna barely gets the girl to talk. His persistence is charming.
The story's heavy on dialogue which isn't necessarily bad but some of the conversations are awkward in nature. I think if you shorten some of the speech the reading would flow much easier. For example: 'I am' to 'I'm' or 'She is' to 'She's'. You can also elaborate on certain things using the five senses like instead of saying: 'The meal was delicious!', you can add: 'I think it was more the atmosphere of the people around me that made eating dinner much more enjoyable. So this is what a family dinner is like.' Something to that extent. But I guess the simple bluntness of the story is what makes me imagine more when reading. So maybe don't change too much. haha :)
The interactions between Stephanie & Callum feel very natural. My favorite has to be after their kiss when they discuss the possibility of being boyfriend & girlfriend in a sarcastic and teasing manner.
PS I don't know if you know but Olive Garden is actually a franchise restaurant here in the US. I'm sure it's a different restaurant than in your story.
Aw I like the cute scenes coming on towards the end with Stephanie opening up and Callum learning to care for that one special person. It's so cute and fluffy! I love it!
In the first chapter when you introduced her, I thought Stephanie was much more younger like in her teens because of how young she sounded. But as the chapters progressed, she has matured with some innocence still lingering in her nature. I thought Callum would have a hard time cracking her bubble especially since Johanna barely gets the girl to talk. His persistence is charming.
The story's heavy on dialogue which isn't necessarily bad but some of the conversations are awkward in nature. I think if you shorten some of the speech the reading would flow much easier. For example: 'I am' to 'I'm' or 'She is' to 'She's'. You can also elaborate on certain things using the five senses like instead of saying: 'The meal was delicious!', you can add: 'I think it was more the atmosphere of the people around me that made eating dinner much more enjoyable. So this is what a family dinner is like.' Something to that extent. But I guess the simple bluntness of the story is what makes me imagine more when reading. So maybe don't change too much. haha :)
The interactions between Stephanie & Callum feel very natural. My favorite has to be after their kiss when they discuss the possibility of being boyfriend & girlfriend in a sarcastic and teasing manner.
PS I don't know if you know but Olive Garden is actually a franchise restaurant here in the US. I'm sure it's a different restaurant than in your story.
7/18/2012 c17 El-Dogzzz
Yes yes yes. I love these two chapters :)
Yes yes yes. I love these two chapters :)
7/15/2012 c15 Jasmine
Great story continue
Great story continue
7/14/2012 c15 El-Dogzzz
Just read through it all.. I love it! Its simple yet captivating. Very well written, I like the differing perspectives. Another great story :)
Just read through it all.. I love it! Its simple yet captivating. Very well written, I like the differing perspectives. Another great story :)
7/6/2012 c14 Guest
Please continue writing
Please continue writing
7/6/2012 c14 1TheArtsAddict
I definitely share the relief of a first kiss (finally) with Stephanie. Very well done
1TheArtsAddictI definitely share the relief of a first kiss (finally) with Stephanie. Very well done
7/6/2012 c13 TheArtsAddict
Meep. So wonderful. Everything is so beautifully and simply explained, so it's easy to imagine it :)
Meep. So wonderful. Everything is so beautifully and simply explained, so it's easy to imagine it :)
7/6/2012 c12 TheArtsAddict
Things are really picking up. The plot gets better and better each time I read it
Things are really picking up. The plot gets better and better each time I read it
7/6/2012 c11 TheArtsAddict
I adore the playful nature you've given this relationship. It's a break from the usual "serious" things you usually read in these kinds of novels. No Melodrama. Love it, love it, love it.
I adore the playful nature you've given this relationship. It's a break from the usual "serious" things you usually read in these kinds of novels. No Melodrama. Love it, love it, love it.