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for Night and Day

4/7/2013 c3 1Thisispapu
MORE! lol
I love the story line, keep up good work XD
7/11/2012 c1 Kathy Barham
Excellent medias res (Latin for starting in the middle) beginning. I like the fact that the reader knows the narrator's propensity to get lost but does not know (like the narrator?) where she is or why she has a suitcase. I also like her choice to walk when she could have been driven. Exquisite staging in paragraph 3 and beautiful, lyrical writing in "a girl in the shadow of a branch," not to mention, mysterious! My only criticism is the inconsistency between "cold eyes" and eyes that reveal pain. I think of cold as being unfeeling. I'll be back to read chapter 1!

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