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for goodbye, slumber doll

10/10/2012 c1 50The Moon Howls At The Wolf
Wow! I love the immagery here! Its very easy to imagine a china doll sitting on a shelf versus a person running around outside, exeriencing life. I see a rhyme here, not a whole scheme between "closed shut" and "for what?" although an argunt can be made for "back then" and "eyes wide open"
Keep writing!
9/5/2012 c1 52BlameMyMuses
Ooh, I love convoluted rhyme schemes!

Very nicely done. I loved the imagery of the china doll, waiting for something to happen and the idea of being awaken. Or, at least, that's what I got.

Great work,
BlameMyMuses
8/21/2012 c1 11Nabo Preo
That was nice!
7/5/2012 c1 16Spring Storm
The rhyme scheme is really cool. I like how you slant-rhymed "then" and "open" - really clever. I also like the poem itself. The idea of dreaming with eyes open is really interesting. Good job!

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