8/11/2012 c1 Skylar Owens
There smart for there age. Lol. Did there preened pass away? I love it please continue!
There smart for there age. Lol. Did there preened pass away? I love it please continue!
8/10/2012 c1 26HSH
I find the premise to be interesting, I just wish that you would have given it more detail, such as where it takes place at, and what the antagonists look like in more detail. Also some more back story would help to. I did like however how the two young girls for the most part, had the voices of six year olds.
I find the premise to be interesting, I just wish that you would have given it more detail, such as where it takes place at, and what the antagonists look like in more detail. Also some more back story would help to. I did like however how the two young girls for the most part, had the voices of six year olds.
8/9/2012 c1 10devilishd
I reviewed ! (: You have alot of potential, You did good with working from a young girl's view and you insert just the right amount of dialogue and Description. My one amount of constructive criticism would be a common problem for all writers (myself obviously included) just misspelled and missing words (: nothing big. Anyway Your Story was a really good one-shot keep up the good work !
I reviewed ! (: You have alot of potential, You did good with working from a young girl's view and you insert just the right amount of dialogue and Description. My one amount of constructive criticism would be a common problem for all writers (myself obviously included) just misspelled and missing words (: nothing big. Anyway Your Story was a really good one-shot keep up the good work !