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2/26/2014 c1 4Veronica Fay
This was very sweet! I like how well you showed the emotions!
9/15/2012 c1 S.H. Marr
Awww, this was so sweet.

Sweet, and very dialogue heavy. I like the plot here and I know you needed a lot of exposition for something so short to explain their relationship and such, but I feel you could have done it differently. You have these huge chunks of text with no interruptions (even though even when someone is trying to explain themselves, the other person tends to go, "Oh, but.." or "I'm so sorry that.."). So it didn't seem quite real. Maybe you should break that up more.

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