for The Zodiac Chronicles: Irisa - Tiger's Eye Book 211/2/2015 c8 
2BLKGURLSMUSE
I am just getting around to reading this. I am so glad I did. I hope you plan on finishing it.
2BLKGURLSMUSEI am just getting around to reading this. I am so glad I did. I hope you plan on finishing it.
10/9/2014 c7 8qpst1235
When I got an email saying that it was updated I was so excited. But it wasn't... :(
8qpst1235When I got an email saying that it was updated I was so excited. But it wasn't... :(
10/3/2013 c6 8Riku Masamune
I say, that fight scene was well coordinated, but seemed random to be placed there. But that's what makes it interesting in that way. Well, I hope to see Chapter VII on the horizon soon!
8Riku MasamuneI say, that fight scene was well coordinated, but seemed random to be placed there. But that's what makes it interesting in that way. Well, I hope to see Chapter VII on the horizon soon!
6/28/2013 c6 19Alaeryel
OH MY GOODNESS Ari-I nearly died of an apoplexy when Irisa fought the twins and I will DEFINITELY be watching INTENTLY for another chapter! My curiosity is killing me to find out who Jastra is and Pollae. I am assuming Pollae is the little sister of the King but not sure! A MOST MAGNIFICENT CHAPTER HERE!
19AlaeryelOH MY GOODNESS Ari-I nearly died of an apoplexy when Irisa fought the twins and I will DEFINITELY be watching INTENTLY for another chapter! My curiosity is killing me to find out who Jastra is and Pollae. I am assuming Pollae is the little sister of the King but not sure! A MOST MAGNIFICENT CHAPTER HERE!
6/14/2013 c1 4Lalaith7
First the bigger things:
You're telling us rather than showing us. It would be nice if you could fit information like the curfew into the story more naturally. I see that you're trying to start the story in media res but we don't have a very good sense of setting, even in the immediate. This story would certainly benefit from a fuller picture of what is happening or why.
Those should be addressed first because they will fundamentally change what is written BUT you also have several misspelled or misused words throughout. This chapter would benefit from better copy editing in addition to the more fundamental changed mentioned above.
Lastly, personally I feel that you've given Irisa all of these strengths but we have no sense of her weaknesses. If she's so great why would anyone be able to control or restrict her in any way AND why in the world would the king trust her not to kill him.
I hope that helps.
4Lalaith7First the bigger things:
You're telling us rather than showing us. It would be nice if you could fit information like the curfew into the story more naturally. I see that you're trying to start the story in media res but we don't have a very good sense of setting, even in the immediate. This story would certainly benefit from a fuller picture of what is happening or why.
Those should be addressed first because they will fundamentally change what is written BUT you also have several misspelled or misused words throughout. This chapter would benefit from better copy editing in addition to the more fundamental changed mentioned above.
Lastly, personally I feel that you've given Irisa all of these strengths but we have no sense of her weaknesses. If she's so great why would anyone be able to control or restrict her in any way AND why in the world would the king trust her not to kill him.
I hope that helps.
3/25/2013 c5 19Alaeryel
VERY VERY GOOD Ari! So this one Lord's daughter has me confused a bit-was she taken and at the same place as the other women and children? If not where is she and did she run away with the guy or was she kidnapped? Also I wonder why Irisa doesn't say anything to Conall about the women/children? It could be she doesn't know whether he is involved or not or just doesn't know he is concerned about them. I think Conall is going to have his hands EXTREMELY FULL with her and I STILL ADORE Liluth! I am glad Irisa has a friend she can trust now and I am also curious about this Daeor-is it an actual thing or could it be someone. I will be anxiously awaiting more and BELIEVE ME I DO KNOW WHAT A PAIN WRITER'S BLOCK CAN BE-have hit several times myself girl-I hope it goes away and leaves you alone for a long time now!
19AlaeryelVERY VERY GOOD Ari! So this one Lord's daughter has me confused a bit-was she taken and at the same place as the other women and children? If not where is she and did she run away with the guy or was she kidnapped? Also I wonder why Irisa doesn't say anything to Conall about the women/children? It could be she doesn't know whether he is involved or not or just doesn't know he is concerned about them. I think Conall is going to have his hands EXTREMELY FULL with her and I STILL ADORE Liluth! I am glad Irisa has a friend she can trust now and I am also curious about this Daeor-is it an actual thing or could it be someone. I will be anxiously awaiting more and BELIEVE ME I DO KNOW WHAT A PAIN WRITER'S BLOCK CAN BE-have hit several times myself girl-I hope it goes away and leaves you alone for a long time now!
3/19/2013 c4 DeathlyIceMaiden
Ahw I think I'm starting to adore the snake! I want suii as man friend!
Ahw I think I'm starting to adore the snake! I want suii as man friend!
2/28/2013 c4 Alaeryel
WOW Ari-LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVED this chapter! I am already in LOVE with the twins and Liluth! I am wondering why Elion and Elian volunteered to be her guards and where all these twists and turns are going to lead. GREAT JOB AGAIN AND LOOKING FOR MORE!
WOW Ari-LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVED this chapter! I am already in LOVE with the twins and Liluth! I am wondering why Elion and Elian volunteered to be her guards and where all these twists and turns are going to lead. GREAT JOB AGAIN AND LOOKING FOR MORE!
2/20/2013 c1 9Destiny1406
This is interesting, but needs some work. Some words were spelled wrong, some sentences should have been shortened, and the parts that italicized need work also!
I think if you reread it, you might be able to find your mistakes and fix them!
I liked the plot though, and I"m curious to see where this is going! I like her attitude! She's fiesty! :)
9Destiny1406This is interesting, but needs some work. Some words were spelled wrong, some sentences should have been shortened, and the parts that italicized need work also!
I think if you reread it, you might be able to find your mistakes and fix them!
I liked the plot though, and I"m curious to see where this is going! I like her attitude! She's fiesty! :)
12/25/2012 c3 19Alaeryel
I understand college can be crazy and busy but have to say I was a bit disappointed here. I would rather have late updates and have something worth reading than have something so short or nothing that is a waste of my time. I think you have a great story here Ari but at this point and time I don't think it is for me-there was a promising start then nothing.
19AlaeryelI understand college can be crazy and busy but have to say I was a bit disappointed here. I would rather have late updates and have something worth reading than have something so short or nothing that is a waste of my time. I think you have a great story here Ari but at this point and time I don't think it is for me-there was a promising start then nothing.
12/25/2012 c2 Alaeryel
Well-one of the shortest chapters I have ever read and was hoping for more but that is alright-I am on to the next chapter now and wondering if more questions will be raised-I love a story that can capture my attention.
Well-one of the shortest chapters I have ever read and was hoping for more but that is alright-I am on to the next chapter now and wondering if more questions will be raised-I love a story that can capture my attention.
12/25/2012 c1 Alaeryel
Interesting Ari-I enjoyed this chapter and Irisa intrigues me. When she thought of her father's face when asked if she were an assissin, I have to wonder if he was one or they thought he was and killed him-hmmm will have to continue on to see if my questions are answered and to find out what other twists and turns you have planned for this story!
Interesting Ari-I enjoyed this chapter and Irisa intrigues me. When she thought of her father's face when asked if she were an assissin, I have to wonder if he was one or they thought he was and killed him-hmmm will have to continue on to see if my questions are answered and to find out what other twists and turns you have planned for this story!