for Haunting the forgotten6/1/2019 c2 
11Fall Storm
Whoever it is, I hope I give him - or it - indigestion. Haha that is exactly how I would think.
This is actually really really creepy. Her not able to see in the Darkness, not really sure who's coming, creepy, but I like it. And this 'Golden one' don't know what to think about that.
Humm human sacrifices maybe? Why though?
I like how you build up the tension.
11Fall StormWhoever it is, I hope I give him - or it - indigestion. Haha that is exactly how I would think.
This is actually really really creepy. Her not able to see in the Darkness, not really sure who's coming, creepy, but I like it. And this 'Golden one' don't know what to think about that.
Humm human sacrifices maybe? Why though?
I like how you build up the tension.
5/31/2019 c1 Fall Storm
Wow, you write beautifully. I normally don't like first person, but this story is a happy medium for me. I find it interesting that it goes back and forth with what is happening and her thoughts, it's different.
Though, i know that this is a review exchange, but I don't know if I'll be much help for ya, you write so beautifully
Wow, you write beautifully. I normally don't like first person, but this story is a happy medium for me. I find it interesting that it goes back and forth with what is happening and her thoughts, it's different.
Though, i know that this is a review exchange, but I don't know if I'll be much help for ya, you write so beautifully
10/2/2017 c14 21RainbowPearls
Wow! You have not only taken Jay to the outside but us too! The flowering season was cool and awesome! I could feel the cool breezes already set.
The dream was funnny, with him smirking in background and the fruit running away from her, I'd only run after a pizza if it happened to run away from me **giggles**
well, she does misses them...Hmm.
21RainbowPearlsWow! You have not only taken Jay to the outside but us too! The flowering season was cool and awesome! I could feel the cool breezes already set.
The dream was funnny, with him smirking in background and the fruit running away from her, I'd only run after a pizza if it happened to run away from me **giggles**
well, she does misses them...Hmm.
10/2/2017 c13 RainbowPearls
Wow!
The narrator seems over excitedly about Alice. At first I was a bit shocked when she said that the word was ancient. I was like O.o
But then, finally she accepted. **whuuhuu*
Aww, worrying so much about the upcoming baby. I can sense the happiness of the narrator for becoming a father. :D
Hopefully, mutations and other rays wont be a problem.
Wow!
The narrator seems over excitedly about Alice. At first I was a bit shocked when she said that the word was ancient. I was like O.o
But then, finally she accepted. **whuuhuu*
Aww, worrying so much about the upcoming baby. I can sense the happiness of the narrator for becoming a father. :D
Hopefully, mutations and other rays wont be a problem.
10/2/2017 c12 RainbowPearls
Aww, she has frustrated him compelling him to eventually eat her, haha.
That was nice of him to keep her busy with the books daily he would leave for her _
Stone faced people? I assume he is just like Kai, aww.
That was so sweet for him bringing for her the fruit she adored. **my mouth waters too**
But then, she's being stubborn again wanting her to eat again? XD Somehow, I don't get angry at her this attitude, rather I feel like laughing.
Hmm, the guy lost his stuttering weakness and became a bit cruel, makes em think :P
Aww, she has frustrated him compelling him to eventually eat her, haha.
That was nice of him to keep her busy with the books daily he would leave for her _
Stone faced people? I assume he is just like Kai, aww.
That was so sweet for him bringing for her the fruit she adored. **my mouth waters too**
But then, she's being stubborn again wanting her to eat again? XD Somehow, I don't get angry at her this attitude, rather I feel like laughing.
Hmm, the guy lost his stuttering weakness and became a bit cruel, makes em think :P
10/2/2017 c11 RainbowPearls
Buhaha, that line was funny " I always thought she would chose her best friend rather than...". That was really so like her. ;D
Ohh, **smirks** Mr silent is too cute with that attitude ;D
Why does she really want to be eaten by him XD I wonder!
God, she is so heartless, just to save her family and Wylin,(never knew he would be a bully) she want to be eaten! :(
So so, Wylin "was" bully.
I assume happily he's dead! ;D
Buhaha, that line was funny " I always thought she would chose her best friend rather than...". That was really so like her. ;D
Ohh, **smirks** Mr silent is too cute with that attitude ;D
Why does she really want to be eaten by him XD I wonder!
God, she is so heartless, just to save her family and Wylin,(never knew he would be a bully) she want to be eaten! :(
So so, Wylin "was" bully.
I assume happily he's dead! ;D
10/2/2017 c10 RainbowPearls
Hahha, she dint get to know about the ending of the tale, god, the book was carried away with our future Golden one.
XD
The fight was cool and it made me feel I was there cheering for the little Machaely.
I liked the way he wanted her to explain the words she couldn't comprehend at the time. That was so cute!
Hahha, she dint get to know about the ending of the tale, god, the book was carried away with our future Golden one.
XD
The fight was cool and it made me feel I was there cheering for the little Machaely.
I liked the way he wanted her to explain the words she couldn't comprehend at the time. That was so cute!
10/2/2017 c9 RainbowPearls
Haha, I liked reading her frustrations, especially her attempt to go in that glass tube and do what the golden one can do. Lol, I felt like she really should feel defeated when he changed her, haha. Talking about privilege, she’s very protective of herself, I think.
That line was funny when she expresses to tear that sheet apart if he ignore her anymore, **chuckles**
Let’s see if she’s got the faculty to comprehend the, say, golden text/message.
Haha, I liked reading her frustrations, especially her attempt to go in that glass tube and do what the golden one can do. Lol, I felt like she really should feel defeated when he changed her, haha. Talking about privilege, she’s very protective of herself, I think.
That line was funny when she expresses to tear that sheet apart if he ignore her anymore, **chuckles**
Let’s see if she’s got the faculty to comprehend the, say, golden text/message.
10/2/2017 c8 RainbowPearls
I liked this interlude and it gives a different perspective of how someone can be not afraid of death. Well, the narrator does seems infatuated with Alice, mentioning her as the reason for living and "Alice fever" XD
Apart from that, sorry if my comments seems too cliche. :P
Actually, the first interlude confused me since I hadn't read the heading, that it was an interlude. ;)
I liked this interlude and it gives a different perspective of how someone can be not afraid of death. Well, the narrator does seems infatuated with Alice, mentioning her as the reason for living and "Alice fever" XD
Apart from that, sorry if my comments seems too cliche. :P
Actually, the first interlude confused me since I hadn't read the heading, that it was an interlude. ;)
10/2/2017 c7 RainbowPearls
Yeah, i am sure this experiment will be better than you thought ;D
So, wasn't it so good that her Malch turned to be the golden one?
Come on, Jaydee, he won't eat you. Actually he can't.
And finally the things are clearing and I feel this is going to be really interesting. Still she thinks that he will eventually make her his meal. Sad.
Yeah, i am sure this experiment will be better than you thought ;D
So, wasn't it so good that her Malch turned to be the golden one?
Come on, Jaydee, he won't eat you. Actually he can't.
And finally the things are clearing and I feel this is going to be really interesting. Still she thinks that he will eventually make her his meal. Sad.
10/1/2017 c6 RainbowPearls
wait a second. Is this the guy who was wanting Jaydee?
Hahhaa, the shower scene was cute and funny and I almost chuckled the way she was flustering.
Is Wylin dead or what. Why does she keep remembering that guy? :P
wait a second. Is this the guy who was wanting Jaydee?
Hahhaa, the shower scene was cute and funny and I almost chuckled the way she was flustering.
Is Wylin dead or what. Why does she keep remembering that guy? :P
10/1/2017 c5 RainbowPearls
Okay, alright, so this guy is the "Golden one" who will rescue her, or say provide seclusion.. Then what about that guy who had kissed her in some previous chapter and she felt like they had promised in the past to stand by the side. My conscience says that he isn't that guy. Right?
Haha, but it makes me wonder too that how can he stay so Slim after eating a huge meal. One thing is clear. She does misses Walyn. Hmm.
:D
Okay, alright, so this guy is the "Golden one" who will rescue her, or say provide seclusion.. Then what about that guy who had kissed her in some previous chapter and she felt like they had promised in the past to stand by the side. My conscience says that he isn't that guy. Right?
Haha, but it makes me wonder too that how can he stay so Slim after eating a huge meal. One thing is clear. She does misses Walyn. Hmm.
:D
10/1/2017 c4 RainbowPearls
Wait a second. Is this the flashback?
It means they are going away, escaping the Earth because of Solar flare? And it also mean that the Deogel has started to dominate over here and they are taking rescue in some large planes and other scientific related stuff.
And it does seems from her conscience that she does hates writing xD
Let me know if its the flashback. Hmm, and if it is, it means then at some point in future, she needed being caught.:( She refers to Jaydee, right?
Wait a second. Is this the flashback?
It means they are going away, escaping the Earth because of Solar flare? And it also mean that the Deogel has started to dominate over here and they are taking rescue in some large planes and other scientific related stuff.
And it does seems from her conscience that she does hates writing xD
Let me know if its the flashback. Hmm, and if it is, it means then at some point in future, she needed being caught.:( She refers to Jaydee, right?
10/1/2017 c3 RainbowPearls
I just have a big one question in my mind. WHO I "HE"? Is he Walyn? I guess no. Or someone else who had promised her to stand by her side in the harsh time. Till now, I couldn't discern something scientific but the story does seems to interest me and I wonder if he will be her rescuer. And it also implies that the setting includes colonizers who tortures children. Hmm
Lets move the next chappie-
I just have a big one question in my mind. WHO I "HE"? Is he Walyn? I guess no. Or someone else who had promised her to stand by her side in the harsh time. Till now, I couldn't discern something scientific but the story does seems to interest me and I wonder if he will be her rescuer. And it also implies that the setting includes colonizers who tortures children. Hmm
Lets move the next chappie-
10/1/2017 c2 RainbowPearls
So, is the thing named Dragoul gonna make her the meal?
I assume Vivelein, Mashae are her friends and Wylin, of course ehr lover..
Huh? Why is she feeling sad for Wylin, just because she couldn't bear his children?
I wonder what Wylin figures this.
What is the "golden one" thingy anyway?
So, is the thing named Dragoul gonna make her the meal?
I assume Vivelein, Mashae are her friends and Wylin, of course ehr lover..
Huh? Why is she feeling sad for Wylin, just because she couldn't bear his children?
I wonder what Wylin figures this.
What is the "golden one" thingy anyway?