for Just a Tool10/7/2018 c20 
25Jaya Avendel
I love this chapter! Ayn is more and more of a Shield every day, in that he protects those he loves. Piqa is beating up on himself. I love the moment between Piqa and Ayn after Ayn slaps him to bring him back to himself because of the love and warmth shown between the two men there over a woman both care about.
Being a Tool is not easy by any means, and the bitterness of Piqa's last line brings it out.
Looking forward to more!
25Jaya AvendelI love this chapter! Ayn is more and more of a Shield every day, in that he protects those he loves. Piqa is beating up on himself. I love the moment between Piqa and Ayn after Ayn slaps him to bring him back to himself because of the love and warmth shown between the two men there over a woman both care about.
Being a Tool is not easy by any means, and the bitterness of Piqa's last line brings it out.
Looking forward to more!
9/25/2018 c19 Jaya Avendel
Ayn's willingness to give Xi his blood is supportive of him but his ill-spoken remark to Piqa caused a little tension. I hope Piqa does not hold many grudges.
I almost think someone wants to get Xi killed. Users see Tools as objects to be used until they break, mended, and used again. This Scramble Alert will be hard for Xi and Ayn will not be sleeping again tonight.
Looking forward to more!
Ayn's willingness to give Xi his blood is supportive of him but his ill-spoken remark to Piqa caused a little tension. I hope Piqa does not hold many grudges.
I almost think someone wants to get Xi killed. Users see Tools as objects to be used until they break, mended, and used again. This Scramble Alert will be hard for Xi and Ayn will not be sleeping again tonight.
Looking forward to more!
9/25/2018 c18 Jaya Avendel
Xi does have a tendency to push until she can push no more, especially in battle. I love how you showed if from Ayn's point of view. I am glad he does not blame himself too much for what happened to her; his thought that she had been his shield this once did not hold any bitterness to it.
Ayn's thoughts on Users and Tools and the family that never exists in this world shows he is feeling feelings to, for Piqa and Xi. Friendship is a powerful thing to have on your side.
Xi does have a tendency to push until she can push no more, especially in battle. I love how you showed if from Ayn's point of view. I am glad he does not blame himself too much for what happened to her; his thought that she had been his shield this once did not hold any bitterness to it.
Ayn's thoughts on Users and Tools and the family that never exists in this world shows he is feeling feelings to, for Piqa and Xi. Friendship is a powerful thing to have on your side.
9/5/2018 c17 Jaya Avendel
Piqa is so sweet. I love his gentle and caring nature. Despite his lower status, he is not broken inside. He reminds me of water; undisturbed and always flowing.
Ayn's conversation with Piqa was heartfelt. Two men both looking out for one reckless woman neither of them can predict or protect or even control as much as they would like to. Ayn and Piqa's love for on another and love for Xi is the one thing holding firm in the society of Users and Tools.
I hope Piqa's trying is enough! He gives all he has for his friends.
Looking forward to more.
Piqa is so sweet. I love his gentle and caring nature. Despite his lower status, he is not broken inside. He reminds me of water; undisturbed and always flowing.
Ayn's conversation with Piqa was heartfelt. Two men both looking out for one reckless woman neither of them can predict or protect or even control as much as they would like to. Ayn and Piqa's love for on another and love for Xi is the one thing holding firm in the society of Users and Tools.
I hope Piqa's trying is enough! He gives all he has for his friends.
Looking forward to more.
9/5/2018 c16 Jaya Avendel
I love how you described the tension in the opening scenes between Xi and Phraq. Xi's hatred of the Warhammer literally rolled off her. Phraq seems to understand he can rile her up by poking at Ayn.
Seeing the conversation between Ayn and Xi through Piqa's eyes was new. I liked how his thoughts floated around as he listened to their conversation. I can feel his pain, and I feel for Ayn to.
Looking forward to more!
I love how you described the tension in the opening scenes between Xi and Phraq. Xi's hatred of the Warhammer literally rolled off her. Phraq seems to understand he can rile her up by poking at Ayn.
Seeing the conversation between Ayn and Xi through Piqa's eyes was new. I liked how his thoughts floated around as he listened to their conversation. I can feel his pain, and I feel for Ayn to.
Looking forward to more!
8/12/2018 c15 Jaya Avendel
Piqa'a narrative is calm and peaceful, longing and wistful at the same time. You have conveyed each tone perfectly. Seeing the celebration through his eyes showed a different side of celebrating.
The scoreboard makes the entire situation sound like a grand game put on for the Users to enjoy from the bleachers.
Ah, I see we have a new character. Phraq. I am not sure what he wants with Xi, but I liked her thought on why the Warhammers come to the Data Room. Their large blasts of energy must kill people from both sides.
Looking forward to seeing where the confrontation goes!
Piqa'a narrative is calm and peaceful, longing and wistful at the same time. You have conveyed each tone perfectly. Seeing the celebration through his eyes showed a different side of celebrating.
The scoreboard makes the entire situation sound like a grand game put on for the Users to enjoy from the bleachers.
Ah, I see we have a new character. Phraq. I am not sure what he wants with Xi, but I liked her thought on why the Warhammers come to the Data Room. Their large blasts of energy must kill people from both sides.
Looking forward to seeing where the confrontation goes!
8/12/2018 c14 Jaya Avendel
Xi's thoughts are powerful as she fights a battle she has no choice but to fight in. Tools must go where they are taken and wielded. But I feel Xi's thirst for more control over her own life.
I do not think many of her fellow Tools see her and Ayn as anything but Sword and Shield and also Lovers because of the way everyone accepts the two go together. I do not think the Tools see that there is such a thing as simple friendship.
The last words of this chapter are particularly powerful, showing what Xi really fights for.
Xi's thoughts are powerful as she fights a battle she has no choice but to fight in. Tools must go where they are taken and wielded. But I feel Xi's thirst for more control over her own life.
I do not think many of her fellow Tools see her and Ayn as anything but Sword and Shield and also Lovers because of the way everyone accepts the two go together. I do not think the Tools see that there is such a thing as simple friendship.
The last words of this chapter are particularly powerful, showing what Xi really fights for.
7/30/2018 c13 Jaya Avendel
Xi hates Arrows and despises Warhammers. I am wondering if that will cause problems later on. Xi might make some fearsome enemies for both Arrows and Warhammers seem to have immense energy destruction abilities, making a formidable force.
What else do weapons do but destroy? That is indeed a good question. There is a line that describes a true warrior well: "A true warrior knows not when to take a life but when to spare one".
Xi is a true warrior, and I think she would take a different path if a User did not hold the hilt of her sword. She asks herself good questions and tries to explore them on her own. I think it might help if she opened up her thoughts to Ayn and Piqa. Although, it could be dangerous.
What DO you say to someone who would die for you? I can think of nothing to say.
Looking forward to more! The individual thoughts of each character is fascinating.
Xi hates Arrows and despises Warhammers. I am wondering if that will cause problems later on. Xi might make some fearsome enemies for both Arrows and Warhammers seem to have immense energy destruction abilities, making a formidable force.
What else do weapons do but destroy? That is indeed a good question. There is a line that describes a true warrior well: "A true warrior knows not when to take a life but when to spare one".
Xi is a true warrior, and I think she would take a different path if a User did not hold the hilt of her sword. She asks herself good questions and tries to explore them on her own. I think it might help if she opened up her thoughts to Ayn and Piqa. Although, it could be dangerous.
What DO you say to someone who would die for you? I can think of nothing to say.
Looking forward to more! The individual thoughts of each character is fascinating.
7/30/2018 c12 Jaya Avendel
Xi is definitely more brutal then Piqa and Ayn. You have a magnificent job of working the personality of each of the character's purpose into their being. Xi thinks like a warrior but she wants to be free.
It looks like she has questioned her status from an early age and she wants to bring down the Users. Users do not like people who question the rules. Xi learned early how to be quiet and think on the inside.
I particularly loved the last line of Xi's. It brought across a lot of sadness and pain as well as endurance in a few short lines.
Xi is definitely more brutal then Piqa and Ayn. You have a magnificent job of working the personality of each of the character's purpose into their being. Xi thinks like a warrior but she wants to be free.
It looks like she has questioned her status from an early age and she wants to bring down the Users. Users do not like people who question the rules. Xi learned early how to be quiet and think on the inside.
I particularly loved the last line of Xi's. It brought across a lot of sadness and pain as well as endurance in a few short lines.
7/22/2018 c11 Jaya Avendel
The moments between Ayn and Piqa were a little awkward. I do not think either of them dare make friends well because of their different status's so feeling for one another makes them uncomfortable and hesitant.
The picture of the two sitting there was well done and vivid. I enjoyed the moments of silence they sat in and their emotional conversation; it was all so real. It was amusing when Ayn referred to Piqa's 'damages', and his discomfort at the job made me smile!
Looking forward to more! And hoping Piqa can sort himself out.
The moments between Ayn and Piqa were a little awkward. I do not think either of them dare make friends well because of their different status's so feeling for one another makes them uncomfortable and hesitant.
The picture of the two sitting there was well done and vivid. I enjoyed the moments of silence they sat in and their emotional conversation; it was all so real. It was amusing when Ayn referred to Piqa's 'damages', and his discomfort at the job made me smile!
Looking forward to more! And hoping Piqa can sort himself out.
7/22/2018 c10 Jaya Avendel
That User was brutal! So much so, and cruel. But I suppose even Users make judgments and Piqa's scars turned the User into someone disgusted with the tainted man he saw. Lying on the floor for such a long time, unable to move sounds horribly unpleasant.
Ayn's a nice guy. He seems to understand Piqa's wishes. But I can understand Piqa's urge to giggle to. Well done!
That User was brutal! So much so, and cruel. But I suppose even Users make judgments and Piqa's scars turned the User into someone disgusted with the tainted man he saw. Lying on the floor for such a long time, unable to move sounds horribly unpleasant.
Ayn's a nice guy. He seems to understand Piqa's wishes. But I can understand Piqa's urge to giggle to. Well done!
7/11/2018 c9 Jaya Avendel
It was a User. Just not in the sense I guessed.
Those Tools are so abused, especially the domestic ones. The User you introduced is a sick example of the lot of them, it seems, and you did an excellent job making me hate the User and wish I could rescue Piqa. He is in a bad spot; immobilized makes it worst!
Looking forward to seeing what will happen next. The chapter title makes sense now; it is all about trust or, in this case, not.
It was a User. Just not in the sense I guessed.
Those Tools are so abused, especially the domestic ones. The User you introduced is a sick example of the lot of them, it seems, and you did an excellent job making me hate the User and wish I could rescue Piqa. He is in a bad spot; immobilized makes it worst!
Looking forward to seeing what will happen next. The chapter title makes sense now; it is all about trust or, in this case, not.
7/11/2018 c8 Jaya Avendel
Piqa's chain of thought was different from the other two, reflecting his Domestic Tool status. I guess his scars are kind of like Ayn's braids; a sort of label for his class.
Everything normal came to an end? I am worried; maybe the Users swooped in to snatch Piqa off to apply more scars to him or something?
Piqa's chain of thought was different from the other two, reflecting his Domestic Tool status. I guess his scars are kind of like Ayn's braids; a sort of label for his class.
Everything normal came to an end? I am worried; maybe the Users swooped in to snatch Piqa off to apply more scars to him or something?
6/28/2018 c7 Jaya Avendel
A Brush. And Users could not be more fitting a term for the people at the top. Users. Horrible but at the same time true.
Xi is one of the people who wants to defy the world she lives in and maybe even change it. Or, at the very least, stop being handled like the tool she is. Xi's examination of her emotions was heartfelt. She is caged and wants to break free.
The last lines were powerful, and I look forward to seeing if she ever does break free.
A Brush. And Users could not be more fitting a term for the people at the top. Users. Horrible but at the same time true.
Xi is one of the people who wants to defy the world she lives in and maybe even change it. Or, at the very least, stop being handled like the tool she is. Xi's examination of her emotions was heartfelt. She is caged and wants to break free.
The last lines were powerful, and I look forward to seeing if she ever does break free.
6/28/2018 c6 Jaya Avendel
Poor Xi. Her tormentors really played with her, and went straight for her weakest spot: Piqa.
The brutality of the scene came across so well, and chilled my blood, but such is the nature of horror. Such is the nature of Sword, Spear, and Shield it seems.
I hope Xi is alright. She and Piqa have an unspoken emotion between them, and I sense Xi is feeling bad.
Looking forward to more.
Poor Xi. Her tormentors really played with her, and went straight for her weakest spot: Piqa.
The brutality of the scene came across so well, and chilled my blood, but such is the nature of horror. Such is the nature of Sword, Spear, and Shield it seems.
I hope Xi is alright. She and Piqa have an unspoken emotion between them, and I sense Xi is feeling bad.
Looking forward to more.