for Immortality6/10/2014 c1 kat
Very well written. Would like to read more, an elaboration on the characters in following to this would do very well.
Very well written. Would like to read more, an elaboration on the characters in following to this would do very well.
11/18/2013 c1 
37SuzyDiego
I absolutely loved how this short story. Were you to expand it and further the story you wouldn't see me complaining.
The description and the story were very well thought out and it helped the story flow very smoothly. The only issue I had was with the use of "untimely" and the description that followed. Was it meant to read as "intimately" and not "untimely" as the reader had yet to know that the character was dying? Just wondering.
Otherwise, the story was very well written.
37SuzyDiegoI absolutely loved how this short story. Were you to expand it and further the story you wouldn't see me complaining.
The description and the story were very well thought out and it helped the story flow very smoothly. The only issue I had was with the use of "untimely" and the description that followed. Was it meant to read as "intimately" and not "untimely" as the reader had yet to know that the character was dying? Just wondering.
Otherwise, the story was very well written.
9/12/2013 c1 3TheClosetWriter16
Ooh I really like this! I was kind of hoping that she'd say she didn't want to live forever for something different. But the ending was great anyway! :)
3TheClosetWriter16Ooh I really like this! I was kind of hoping that she'd say she didn't want to live forever for something different. But the ending was great anyway! :)