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2/16/2014 c1 97rust phoenix
i love the golem imagery in this, and "Love is an ending written by / the one who came in / last." this poem is beautiful and sensual and mysterious, and you capture the tone perfectly. the little details that keep coming back to the golem are a wonderful touch.
12/28/2013 c1 1k+Faithless Juliet
I really liked how you utilized the element of water in this piece. From the bad blood to the stream, sands, waterlillies. They all worked really well as threads to pull the piece together. I also liked the darkness of the tone and the formatting you used. The stylized continuation of the verses reminded me of arms reaching out, like the reader was swimming through the ideas one long arm stretch at a time, which conjoined nicely with the continuing metaphors of water. My only real critique is that the piece felt a bit unfocused. Its abstract in nature but maybe its a bit too abstract...


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