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1/6/2014 c1 18FreekyDisaster18
Do you want to know what I love most about Secret Santa? Is that once a year we give each other prompts as stimuli for writing and amazing things happen. This, Melissa, happens to be one of the most fabulous things I have ever read on this website. I adore your other two stories but I believe this one shows a real growth in your writing. The narration is flawless, flowing and completely visual with its imagery. Your narration is witty, to the dot and not unbearable like most would accomplish with light humour. The plot line was fantastic so I applaud Marta for an amazing prompt but I take my hat off to you for writing one of the most original and moving things I could ever imagine. Stunning.
1/4/2014 c1 9Brittany Woods
Wow, Melissa! I loved this! The writing was so poetic and really drew me into the story from the get go. I liked how it felt almost disjointed - like how the thoughts of someone so clearly depressed and sleep deprived might be. I loved how, at the end, the "look alike" turned out to be something real and possible. I initially thought he was going insane or maybe he was seeing her.

There was definitely an underlying sadness to this piece, but the ending suggests hope that the healing process can begin. Like maybe Mikah has finally been forced to face the fact that she's gone and learn to move forward. The ending is concluding yet open ended enough to allow the reader to wonder how Mikah will go from here. Can he move on? Can he grow from this? Will he always remain stunted and a bit broken? Will he find love again - maybe with Megan, maybe with Payton, maybe with someone we've never met - or will he lose himself in Payton because it's as close to Pen as he can get?

Great work! A brilliant story that I really, really enjoyed :)
12/29/2013 c1 stuck in bed
WHAT WHAT HOOW - OFCOURSEYOUFOOLEDMEEE! I was TOTALLY not expecting that but I'm so super glad you did get me 'cause this is awesome and I want it all to myself.

AND YOU DID A MALE POV. Omg, there are no words for that, because that is amazing and perfect and you wrote it so well. And he's a SAD male, which is 10000% harder to write, but you wrote it in a way that seems waaay too effortless. You've got skillzzz.

I love everything - how he's a writer, and how there are bold flashbacks and when Megan goes: "So you saw your dead girlfriend?" I was like WHAT! Total shock, but in a perfect way. You took my ordinary-o prompt and changed it into something extraordinary.

Basically, I love love love this and thank you so much 3 3 3
12/28/2013 c1 wow
loved it.
you did good with youre prompt!
12/28/2013 c1 21rosieroo
OMFG MELISSA!

I honestly think that this is the best piece you've ever written (that I've read, anyway :P). Your writing style has changed so much and although it was fantastic and I loved it before, THIS IS NOW MY FAVOURITE THING EVER ITS SO AMAZING OMG THE IMAGERY!

THE

IMAGERYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Yeah, so you get the point that I think the imagery was fantastic? Your writing was so poetic too and I don't usually like second person (eg, Goosebumps) but I barely even noticed it here. It honestly reads like you put no effort into it at all, like it just flowed right out with no difficult bits. It floooowwwwsssssss. I love the bold bits, where I'm guessing it jumps back in time? It's perfect and manages to convey everything you want in such a short space. I'm sure if I tried to do that, it would be like twenty pages long because I babble on about nothing, but yours is all... streamlined. Yeah, streamlined!

The ending is just perfect. This is the furthest thing from cliche - like, HOW DA FUCK DID YOU THINK OF THIS GIVE ME YOUR BRAIN! I have no idea how you came up with such a crazy unique storyline from Marta's prompt! Ridiculous! As I was reading, I kept thinking 'how the heck has she even done this, it's incredible'.

So needless to say, I love everything about this and could go on for ages but I won't. And now I don't wanna write my SS. YOURS IS TOO GOOD!
12/27/2013 c1 castiel89
I'll tell you again, this was wonderful. A wonderful piece that was a knockout of the prompt. You really need to write more often. I date you to write me a birthday piece. Details at a later date ;)

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