for Frayed Ties1/26/2014 c2 AGreatPerhaps12
Wow. This is…very intriguing :) Can't wait to read more!
Wow. This is…very intriguing :) Can't wait to read more!
1/26/2014 c3 kissedbymidnight
Interesting story so far. I like how Simon is kind of grumpy about having a slave, yet isn't mean or abusive to Danya just because of his annoyance. He's even found a benefit to having Danya around:) Nice cool hands. I wonder if Danya could do that with his entire body. That'd be even more pleasant I'm sure.
I like how Danya can do so many different things with his magic and the contrast between Simon and Hamish. I'm interested to see how they all cope in the future:)
Thanks for sharing!
Interesting story so far. I like how Simon is kind of grumpy about having a slave, yet isn't mean or abusive to Danya just because of his annoyance. He's even found a benefit to having Danya around:) Nice cool hands. I wonder if Danya could do that with his entire body. That'd be even more pleasant I'm sure.
I like how Danya can do so many different things with his magic and the contrast between Simon and Hamish. I'm interested to see how they all cope in the future:)
Thanks for sharing!
1/25/2014 c3 
2Facella
Being a mage sounds kinda convenient. Not worrying about getting too hot or cold, not needing to eat that often... Interesting bit of world building! And is Simon actually getting out of his foul mood? I'm impressed. xD
2FacellaBeing a mage sounds kinda convenient. Not worrying about getting too hot or cold, not needing to eat that often... Interesting bit of world building! And is Simon actually getting out of his foul mood? I'm impressed. xD
1/24/2014 c3 Guest
This is a very good story! Danya is really likable and has a very interesting mix of strength and vulnerability. I also love that he is a secret mage, it makes his situation exciting and nerve racking. I don't love Hamish, he is too often accidentally hurtful or condescending. It is sad that Danya thinks he is below everyone, when really he seems like the best slave to have. I really like Simon; he is kind of gruff and mean at times, but he seems smart and overall like he wouldn't do anything to intentionally hurt Danya, even if he doesn't want him. I hope there is lots of upcoming drama in this story! You are a talented writer, can't wait to see what happens next to poor Danya ;)
This is a very good story! Danya is really likable and has a very interesting mix of strength and vulnerability. I also love that he is a secret mage, it makes his situation exciting and nerve racking. I don't love Hamish, he is too often accidentally hurtful or condescending. It is sad that Danya thinks he is below everyone, when really he seems like the best slave to have. I really like Simon; he is kind of gruff and mean at times, but he seems smart and overall like he wouldn't do anything to intentionally hurt Danya, even if he doesn't want him. I hope there is lots of upcoming drama in this story! You are a talented writer, can't wait to see what happens next to poor Danya ;)
1/18/2014 c2 MagicalWinry
Great second chapter. I have high hopes for Lord Bell. Danya is right in thinking that the real Lord Bell is the man he was speaking to at the dinner table. Lord Bells aggression is directed at Danya right now because he's a convenient outlet for Bell's anger at having to own a slave. Hopefully, Bell will wise up and realize how rude and unfair he's being.
Update soon!
Great second chapter. I have high hopes for Lord Bell. Danya is right in thinking that the real Lord Bell is the man he was speaking to at the dinner table. Lord Bells aggression is directed at Danya right now because he's a convenient outlet for Bell's anger at having to own a slave. Hopefully, Bell will wise up and realize how rude and unfair he's being.
Update soon!
1/18/2014 c1 MagicalWinry
This is a good start! I love how Danya is stronger than he appears; that could be a nice surprise for those who try to hurt him.
This is a good start! I love how Danya is stronger than he appears; that could be a nice surprise for those who try to hurt him.
1/18/2014 c2 Facella
This looks really promising. So far it's been pretty interesting and I'm definitely looking forward to more.
Poor Danya. I'm a little angry at Lord Bell for his behaviour. Yeah, he doesn't want to own a slave, but that's no reason to behave like a complete asshole. Hamish is interesting. He probably doesn't even realize "pup" isn't exactly the best way to address someone...
I'm looking forward to the next chapter! Unfortunately, I'm no good with editing more than spelling or grammar, so I wouldn't be of much use to you. XD
This looks really promising. So far it's been pretty interesting and I'm definitely looking forward to more.
Poor Danya. I'm a little angry at Lord Bell for his behaviour. Yeah, he doesn't want to own a slave, but that's no reason to behave like a complete asshole. Hamish is interesting. He probably doesn't even realize "pup" isn't exactly the best way to address someone...
I'm looking forward to the next chapter! Unfortunately, I'm no good with editing more than spelling or grammar, so I wouldn't be of much use to you. XD
1/17/2014 c2 Guest
: )
: )
1/17/2014 c2 1myscus
Well unimpressed seems the right word. Hope Lord Bell and Danya start to get used to each other without too many catastrophes, though those would be more interesting to read.
1myscusWell unimpressed seems the right word. Hope Lord Bell and Danya start to get used to each other without too many catastrophes, though those would be more interesting to read.
1/16/2014 c1 myscus
Facinating start. I'm looking forward to seeing what happen when we meet lord bell. I'm thinking he may be a little unimpressed with his surprise.
Facinating start. I'm looking forward to seeing what happen when we meet lord bell. I'm thinking he may be a little unimpressed with his surprise.
1/16/2014 c1 Guest
I REALLY want to know what happens next!?
any chance there'll be a part 2 (and/or 3,4,5...)?
I REALLY want to know what happens next!?
any chance there'll be a part 2 (and/or 3,4,5...)?