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2/13/2014 c1 Ruby Owl
To be honest, I have very little idea what is going on here. However, I do think that this is one of the most interesting ideas to see in a realistic fiction setting. I do wish you would use more annotations when you would say that they're speaking, as I occasionally got confused on what the heck is going on, but the language they talk to each other in feels very nice and never weird.

My one major criticism would have to be the fact that this is purely dialogue, and there's no setting or backdrop established whatsoever. I would want to see you describe the office that they're talking in, the day, why she's proposing this now, what's going on, etc, as it could really add some meat to the bare bones essay. The context of this story would probably help me understand what is going on.

As for spelling errors, the one I could catch was "I hope not Miss Henning. I will see you tomorrow." could have been wrote as "I hope not, Miss Henning. I will see you tomorrow.", though that feels more like a nitpick.

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