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6/5/2014 c1 31Who Is This Girl Anyway
You've used some interesting metaphors here, and there's an interesting subtext to it. I think the way that the narrator relates to Hades is an interesting idea, especially considering that the story is occasionally read as Stockholm's Syndrome or as kidnap.

I'm not sure that this structure works as well as it could for the theme you're trying to convey though; the longer lines works well at the end, but sometimes they make the poem drag a little bit at the beginning. However, I do think that the longer lines add a interesting reflection of the kite flying off towards the end.

Overall, the poem is interesting. I think it could perhaps do with a slight compression though - I wouldn't add anything to it as far as lines go, because a lot of the beauty of this is in the ambiguity of the romance, and I daresay adding lines might detract from that. Keep going.

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