for The Assassins of Crow's Cemetery10/8/2015 c1 
17Encore19
This was cool and well-written and definitely spooky! For some reason I really assumed the main character was a big stocky male until you mentioned she was a las. I guess that's my fault for assuming? I did enjoy this though and good luck in the contest! Must've been hard keeping your writing in that accent.
17Encore19This was cool and well-written and definitely spooky! For some reason I really assumed the main character was a big stocky male until you mentioned she was a las. I guess that's my fault for assuming? I did enjoy this though and good luck in the contest! Must've been hard keeping your writing in that accent.
10/8/2015 c1 63RedactedNoLongerWriting
I'm not usually a fan of dialect in writing because to me it makes the character's voice a spectacle, often relying on that for characterization or in place of plot. I agree with Coyote that there were a few places where this didn't feel consistent, but on the whole I think it worked for you. It gave a great effect to what was happening without distracting from the story being told. I like the idea of the warring assassins having a code, and the repercussions of not following that code. It's a neat little story and interesting interpretation of the prompt. Good luck in the WCC this month!
63RedactedNoLongerWritingI'm not usually a fan of dialect in writing because to me it makes the character's voice a spectacle, often relying on that for characterization or in place of plot. I agree with Coyote that there were a few places where this didn't feel consistent, but on the whole I think it worked for you. It gave a great effect to what was happening without distracting from the story being told. I like the idea of the warring assassins having a code, and the repercussions of not following that code. It's a neat little story and interesting interpretation of the prompt. Good luck in the WCC this month!
10/8/2015 c1 82Solemn Coyote
Solid fiction, tight ending, though the dialect doesn't always feel spot on. I really dig the southern gothic vibe to this, and the Tarantino-y feel of a world where hitmen are a dime a dozen.
Also, I couldn't help but wonder if Vash the kid was a reference to something.
82Solemn CoyoteSolid fiction, tight ending, though the dialect doesn't always feel spot on. I really dig the southern gothic vibe to this, and the Tarantino-y feel of a world where hitmen are a dime a dozen.
Also, I couldn't help but wonder if Vash the kid was a reference to something.