for For a Better World4/6/2016 c3 
13360pages
Holy mid chapter time jumps, I didn't mind it. But maybe the first half of the chapter should have been at the end of the previous chapter. So the 2 weeks later won't be as jarring, but this is just my personal preference. Since I like to keep each chapter in a scene and only jump time or place when necessary.
Also, don't update so fast, maybe once every 3-7 days. Give people a chance to sit on and and read it.
13360pagesHoly mid chapter time jumps, I didn't mind it. But maybe the first half of the chapter should have been at the end of the previous chapter. So the 2 weeks later won't be as jarring, but this is just my personal preference. Since I like to keep each chapter in a scene and only jump time or place when necessary.
Also, don't update so fast, maybe once every 3-7 days. Give people a chance to sit on and and read it.
4/6/2016 c2 360pages
We get more information about the world and what types of weapons the characters use and why. More of a set up chapter than anything, that that I particularly mind or anything, it's a set up chapter. A rather long one at that.
We get more information about the world and what types of weapons the characters use and why. More of a set up chapter than anything, that that I particularly mind or anything, it's a set up chapter. A rather long one at that.
3/27/2016 c1 360pages
I noticed you made some changes, but can't review the same chapter twice. This time I am actually going to have a more detailed review for this.
Hitting random on your character select screen is kind of silly.
You actually introduced the characters and the situation pretty well. I kind of have a feeling that Roiyaru will end up with Freya, but I kind of hope not. Then again this is only the first chapter.
I also wonder what the guild does ect.
I noticed you made some changes, but can't review the same chapter twice. This time I am actually going to have a more detailed review for this.
Hitting random on your character select screen is kind of silly.
You actually introduced the characters and the situation pretty well. I kind of have a feeling that Roiyaru will end up with Freya, but I kind of hope not. Then again this is only the first chapter.
I also wonder what the guild does ect.
3/8/2016 c1 360pages
This seems like an interesting mystery story. Though I guess people who go missing end up in the new world right?
This seems like an interesting mystery story. Though I guess people who go missing end up in the new world right?