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for Defenseless

9/2/2017 c1 zomblien89
awesome outcome! you go, girl!
9/14/2016 c1 10Cowboy-4-Christ
Yikes. Though I know quite a few girls who I wouldn't be surprised if they carried knives.
9/7/2016 c1 2VictoriaRose0013
Wow, nice! Keep up the good writing!
4/23/2016 c1 15RaisingDad
Alfred Hitchcock used to publish suspense magazines and books that featured, um, suspense stories and mysteries. I could very easily see this story featured in them. And, hey, I was just as surprised as those college guys were when she pulled out that Bowie knife.
4/23/2016 c1 8LorrahBear
This is a really solid first chapter. You've definitely caught my attention, and I'm so interested to learn more about your character and her ability to protect herself at such young age.

Initially, I was confused because I misread your summary, and thought she was an eleven year old, and was like "no way is this an eleven year old!" So on that note, I would say you've done a great job of making your character young, but not too young. She definitely reads like you intended.

Only one typo that I noticed: "...cursing herself as [every] type of obvious fool..."
4/20/2016 c1 26Zukafu Chiriamoto
Well, I didn't expect a turn quite like that... Excuse me as I sit a little awestruck from the sheer badassery... Okay, better now.
I thought this was a really descriptive piece, rife with tension and dramatic atmosphere.
I really really liked it. Happy writing!
~ Zukafu
4/19/2016 c1 51Brievel
Oh. 0_0 Wow. The writing is riveting... although the names show a distinctly Western tint. o_0 xD
4/19/2016 c1 70BradytheJust
Jeez, put that frogsticker away! Just hold on...
*goes behind alleyway and beats the heck out of the college boys*

Okay onto the review: I really liked how you used the line "Faced down the pack" it really made it feel like she was being hunted. I also liked how you said "Steel nerve and steel blade"
Your writing was wonderful as always and you really put a lot of emotion into your character. Great job my friend :)

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