10/17/2018 c6 Aiko Isari
I feel like I'm walking into an unexplained round of umineko murders. We are no closer to the answers than when we started. The black nails mean a lot but the nails are the first clue something is wrong, different changed.
Use her and toss her into a ditch or a chessboard. So the lie would be going to play would get rid of the nails? Or something else. Something other. No siblings. But what about parents? What's stopping them from betraying her? Or are they already dead?
Remiiiii answer my questions pleaaaseeee.
I feel like I'm walking into an unexplained round of umineko murders. We are no closer to the answers than when we started. The black nails mean a lot but the nails are the first clue something is wrong, different changed.
Use her and toss her into a ditch or a chessboard. So the lie would be going to play would get rid of the nails? Or something else. Something other. No siblings. But what about parents? What's stopping them from betraying her? Or are they already dead?
Remiiiii answer my questions pleaaaseeee.
10/17/2018 c5 Aiko Isari
Ooh, life off of the battlefield.
Interesting. And we see crippled pieces as people. PTSD and loss of limbs. I forgot the word. So becoming black pieces (the enemy) is inevitable it seems. So it makes this endless war. Endless soldiers in endless pithy places. So how do you get promoted if you turn black? Is it going through and making it back I wonder?
Out of curiosity the lack of using names could be precisely because these are only pawns and expendable and therefore a statistic. It's a very simple depersonalization technique and it works well here. Hmm... lots to think about.
Ooh, life off of the battlefield.
Interesting. And we see crippled pieces as people. PTSD and loss of limbs. I forgot the word. So becoming black pieces (the enemy) is inevitable it seems. So it makes this endless war. Endless soldiers in endless pithy places. So how do you get promoted if you turn black? Is it going through and making it back I wonder?
Out of curiosity the lack of using names could be precisely because these are only pawns and expendable and therefore a statistic. It's a very simple depersonalization technique and it works well here. Hmm... lots to think about.
10/17/2018 c4 Aiko Isari
That was just vague enough for me to get confused but I think I understand! The king is always protected, the white king. Even though he may be a spoiled kind of king. The pawns know they have to die for him but they may not deserve that death. The queen overrules most laws.
Pawns have to protect and they do. But do they fail to strike her or does she strike? It's hard to say. but maybe I don't understand chess as well as I ought to for this to make more sense.
"Glad you're cute" ... Cause that doesn't make anyone uncomfortable. Those are terrible last words to hear.
That was just vague enough for me to get confused but I think I understand! The king is always protected, the white king. Even though he may be a spoiled kind of king. The pawns know they have to die for him but they may not deserve that death. The queen overrules most laws.
Pawns have to protect and they do. But do they fail to strike her or does she strike? It's hard to say. but maybe I don't understand chess as well as I ought to for this to make more sense.
"Glad you're cute" ... Cause that doesn't make anyone uncomfortable. Those are terrible last words to hear.
10/17/2018 c3 Aiko Isari
Hm. The simple sentences and writing are helping at the moment but they leave me with a lot of unanswered questions. Then again I think this story focuses a lot on the chess maneuvers and not the world around them at this point.
Can you actually die on the chessboard? Are the pieces immortal? How does this pawn feel not moving vs moving? I want some answers but at the same time I'm not sure I should get them.
Onward!
Hm. The simple sentences and writing are helping at the moment but they leave me with a lot of unanswered questions. Then again I think this story focuses a lot on the chess maneuvers and not the world around them at this point.
Can you actually die on the chessboard? Are the pieces immortal? How does this pawn feel not moving vs moving? I want some answers but at the same time I'm not sure I should get them.
Onward!
10/17/2018 c2 Aiko Isari
So only white pawns are born? Can you be born a black pawn and go white? Is there a retention rate? What makes them out?
I love the idea of this chessboard society. I feel like I need more worldbuilding than these drabbles can give me. Curse you remi! but I'
So only white pawns are born? Can you be born a black pawn and go white? Is there a retention rate? What makes them out?
I love the idea of this chessboard society. I feel like I need more worldbuilding than these drabbles can give me. Curse you remi! but I'
10/17/2018 c1 Aiko Isari
I wish my uncle was reading this, he loves chess.
The narrator is so bitter. All I can think of are the talking chess sets in Harry Potter, where they're quite opinionated. She can't fight or attack or even move very far. Her bitterness makes sense she's pretty much stuck where she is and helpless to anything that comes. But first come first serve she gets to die protecting the queen. You've made me root for a inanimate object getting to the other side. Well done remi.
I wish my uncle was reading this, he loves chess.
The narrator is so bitter. All I can think of are the talking chess sets in Harry Potter, where they're quite opinionated. She can't fight or attack or even move very far. Her bitterness makes sense she's pretty much stuck where she is and helpless to anything that comes. But first come first serve she gets to die protecting the queen. You've made me root for a inanimate object getting to the other side. Well done remi.
10/28/2016 c1 9Sjoorm
Being a major fan of chess, I couldn't skip this one over.
One thing that sticks out to me, why does the length of the pike bind her back? If she's holding it she shouldn't need to be straight-backed to do so comfortably, it should be relatively easy for her to hold in nearly any position, especially if she isn't pointing it straight out. Most chess boards I've seen that are custom made don't have their pawns holding a pike either, they either hold two short swords, one short sword or a sword and shield, so I would think of either changing this or having a reason for the pawns to hold pikes (because they attack diagonally, not dead ahead, this might be hard to explain away). Just my two cents for this first little snippet, I liked it though! Especially the reference to a queens side pawn, being as it's generally a useless piece.
Being a major fan of chess, I couldn't skip this one over.
One thing that sticks out to me, why does the length of the pike bind her back? If she's holding it she shouldn't need to be straight-backed to do so comfortably, it should be relatively easy for her to hold in nearly any position, especially if she isn't pointing it straight out. Most chess boards I've seen that are custom made don't have their pawns holding a pike either, they either hold two short swords, one short sword or a sword and shield, so I would think of either changing this or having a reason for the pawns to hold pikes (because they attack diagonally, not dead ahead, this might be hard to explain away). Just my two cents for this first little snippet, I liked it though! Especially the reference to a queens side pawn, being as it's generally a useless piece.