for Pick and Roll7/12/2022 c1 knockmeoffmyfeet
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Hi, I would like to invite you to join our platform to present a good quality story to our readers! Send me a message if this offer piqued your interest!
7/11/2018 c4 
13Shailaputri
I like Ollie. Seems like you are hiding some secret reason behind him being in student office. And I like the way where Keith doesn't engage himself with Tracy in her rich party. Generally in the stories where the normal girl is thrown into rich school, the way how the author is going to proceed could be guessed easily. But I am not able to guess in this. Particularly her mom seems to be rich. And she seems to be have something competent in her to fight these private school kids.
This comment is about the parts you didn't write, but I think where my guess will go wrong..
Normally the girl ends up being in misery, and somehow the girl would be able to make the icy people like Keith fall for her. And she too will hurt. But the guy used to play around with other girls to make her realize her feeling. Some jealous ex girlfriend will come and claim him as girl like Jay would end up with the guy like Keith kind of characters will be ignored or will loss their importance.
To be honest, seems to be most of the tv serials and stories used to have the same underline formula. I used to wonder whether all the writers are inclined to write same misery story. Somehow they make it feel like being with the rich and being accepted in their group as a mission.
I feel yours is different keeping Ollie character as quite alternate guess..Shared few of my general thoughts too.
Enjoyed reading so far..keep it up..good luck..
13ShailaputriI like Ollie. Seems like you are hiding some secret reason behind him being in student office. And I like the way where Keith doesn't engage himself with Tracy in her rich party. Generally in the stories where the normal girl is thrown into rich school, the way how the author is going to proceed could be guessed easily. But I am not able to guess in this. Particularly her mom seems to be rich. And she seems to be have something competent in her to fight these private school kids.
This comment is about the parts you didn't write, but I think where my guess will go wrong..
Normally the girl ends up being in misery, and somehow the girl would be able to make the icy people like Keith fall for her. And she too will hurt. But the guy used to play around with other girls to make her realize her feeling. Some jealous ex girlfriend will come and claim him as girl like Jay would end up with the guy like Keith kind of characters will be ignored or will loss their importance.
To be honest, seems to be most of the tv serials and stories used to have the same underline formula. I used to wonder whether all the writers are inclined to write same misery story. Somehow they make it feel like being with the rich and being accepted in their group as a mission.
I feel yours is different keeping Ollie character as quite alternate guess..Shared few of my general thoughts too.
Enjoyed reading so far..keep it up..good luck..
7/11/2018 c5 Shailaputri
it is neat..Her attitude towards the game and totally she is great. I only wish that she simply didn't fall for someone who doesn't have equal good characters.. I want to have good girl for good boy...What you prefer may differ..
it is neat..Her attitude towards the game and totally she is great. I only wish that she simply didn't fall for someone who doesn't have equal good characters.. I want to have good girl for good boy...What you prefer may differ..
7/11/2018 c1 Shailaputri
Some authors got this ability to draw picture infront of the eyes of the readers by using their writings. While reading we could be able to see through the story scenes. you are one such author.
Some authors got this ability to draw picture infront of the eyes of the readers by using their writings. While reading we could be able to see through the story scenes. you are one such author.
2/5/2018 c5 Toffeema
I would love it if you continued this! Let's find out what it would take to melt the Ice Siblings!
I would love it if you continued this! Let's find out what it would take to melt the Ice Siblings!
1/5/2018 c5 1Du
I love all the basketball involved in this story! So well written, too. I like that the Jay-Keith relationship is full of rivalry and sort of hatred, I want to see it develop from there, but hope the situation drags on a bit still. Can’t wait for that basketball challenge!
1DuI love all the basketball involved in this story! So well written, too. I like that the Jay-Keith relationship is full of rivalry and sort of hatred, I want to see it develop from there, but hope the situation drags on a bit still. Can’t wait for that basketball challenge!
1/4/2018 c5 3WritingIsNowMyLife
Wow, I'm really enjoying this story! Your writing is amazing - the characters seem very real, and you are able to pen the emotions beautifully. I'm excited to read about the showdown that's about to happen, and hopefully Keith will turn out to be Jay's good friend soon! I hope you update soon so that I can find out :)
3WritingIsNowMyLifeWow, I'm really enjoying this story! Your writing is amazing - the characters seem very real, and you are able to pen the emotions beautifully. I'm excited to read about the showdown that's about to happen, and hopefully Keith will turn out to be Jay's good friend soon! I hope you update soon so that I can find out :)
10/26/2017 c4 1kittysgomeow
I really like where you are going with this. When you did the parts about basketball me, a person who knows nothing about it could easily understand it. I hope you write more soon :)
1kittysgomeowI really like where you are going with this. When you did the parts about basketball me, a person who knows nothing about it could easily understand it. I hope you write more soon :)
10/25/2017 c1 kittysgomeow
i really liked this the one the one thing that bothered me was your slang of air-con I couldn't get past that for the first paragraph, but that is personal preference. I didn't notice any spelling errors. It was well written and descriptive. I did miss not having her name in the first half of the chapter and when it was first mentioned I wasn't sure if it was a nickname or a shorter version. Overall I really liked it.
From the review game,
-Kitty
i really liked this the one the one thing that bothered me was your slang of air-con I couldn't get past that for the first paragraph, but that is personal preference. I didn't notice any spelling errors. It was well written and descriptive. I did miss not having her name in the first half of the chapter and when it was first mentioned I wasn't sure if it was a nickname or a shorter version. Overall I really liked it.
From the review game,
-Kitty
8/12/2017 c4 1Du
Allll of the basketball, oh my! I loved this, seriously. If there was something I didn't like, was perhaps the lack of interaction between the main characters...? Though it's totally normal that at this time in the story their interactions are still kept to a minimum. I really enjoyed this chapter, it didn't feel dragged, it was very good! Keep it up and you're sure to gain a very loyal reader! xx
1DuAllll of the basketball, oh my! I loved this, seriously. If there was something I didn't like, was perhaps the lack of interaction between the main characters...? Though it's totally normal that at this time in the story their interactions are still kept to a minimum. I really enjoyed this chapter, it didn't feel dragged, it was very good! Keep it up and you're sure to gain a very loyal reader! xx
8/6/2017 c3 Guest
Love the beginning of this story, and I liked having more of Jay's background. Please keep writing :)
Love the beginning of this story, and I liked having more of Jay's background. Please keep writing :)
8/6/2017 c3 Du
Hi! I just found this story a couple hours ago and I am loving it thus far! Jay is so relatable- I myself changed schools during high school and that horrible feeling of walking along corridors knowing no-one... Gah! Also, yesss to all the basketball! I am a sucker for anything basketball, so, please, keep including plays in the story! I liked what you did with this chapter, it's nice getting background into main characters, it gives them layers and makes them less 2D. So yep, I am really enjoying this at the moment! Perfectly well written, no grammar or spelling mistakes as far as I could see. I am really looking forward to more, so please keep it up! Cheers :)
Hi! I just found this story a couple hours ago and I am loving it thus far! Jay is so relatable- I myself changed schools during high school and that horrible feeling of walking along corridors knowing no-one... Gah! Also, yesss to all the basketball! I am a sucker for anything basketball, so, please, keep including plays in the story! I liked what you did with this chapter, it's nice getting background into main characters, it gives them layers and makes them less 2D. So yep, I am really enjoying this at the moment! Perfectly well written, no grammar or spelling mistakes as far as I could see. I am really looking forward to more, so please keep it up! Cheers :)