for Chronicles of Sword and Spell2/23/2020 c30 
7WolfGoesBaa
Lots of embarrassing moments in this chapter. Seriously, Elephron is good and I'm starting to wonder what exactly is the differ between a mage and wizard. I don't quite remember him from the old Kel lore which leads me to believe that you created him? Regardless, it's good. I love the exchange between him and Kel especially:
Kel felt insulted. "Just who do you think you are?"
"Well, I think I'm the World King. But I know I'm Elephron
This got me thinking about the past chapter, chapter 26 listed as chapter 29 on the site. It's still very good but reading this chapter, it makes me think that the previous was poorly placed. It would have served as a good transition from Kel's story to Cross' or vice versa. But where it is now, it just sort of breaks the flow of Kel's story.
How could she tell her [that wanted to be] closer? - she wanted to be
"Bargha calls [all of his sons] - all of us his sons(?)
I've decided that, you will not be [being] paid for this assignment - (remove, Elpehron has said 'be being' more than once which makes me question if whether it's an author mistake or a habit of his.)
7WolfGoesBaaLots of embarrassing moments in this chapter. Seriously, Elephron is good and I'm starting to wonder what exactly is the differ between a mage and wizard. I don't quite remember him from the old Kel lore which leads me to believe that you created him? Regardless, it's good. I love the exchange between him and Kel especially:
Kel felt insulted. "Just who do you think you are?"
"Well, I think I'm the World King. But I know I'm Elephron
This got me thinking about the past chapter, chapter 26 listed as chapter 29 on the site. It's still very good but reading this chapter, it makes me think that the previous was poorly placed. It would have served as a good transition from Kel's story to Cross' or vice versa. But where it is now, it just sort of breaks the flow of Kel's story.
How could she tell her [that wanted to be] closer? - she wanted to be
"Bargha calls [all of his sons] - all of us his sons(?)
I've decided that, you will not be [being] paid for this assignment - (remove, Elpehron has said 'be being' more than once which makes me question if whether it's an author mistake or a habit of his.)
2/23/2020 c23 WolfGoesBaa
For some reason, I wrote these reviews but did not post them, so here we go!
Woah, Alex from the Kel universe. That's one character I remember loving. Ah... How I sometimes miss the old days. Things had there own simplicity, when I'd get home and try to get through as many pulse quickening Badass Mage chapters as I could. But I can't spend too long rem the old days, cause I'll miss the present too much! On to the next chapter!
For some reason, I wrote these reviews but did not post them, so here we go!
Woah, Alex from the Kel universe. That's one character I remember loving. Ah... How I sometimes miss the old days. Things had there own simplicity, when I'd get home and try to get through as many pulse quickening Badass Mage chapters as I could. But I can't spend too long rem the old days, cause I'll miss the present too much! On to the next chapter!
2/23/2020 c29 WolfGoesBaa
Wow, this was an amazing chapter. This is is actually good enough to serve as an opening chapter, it has a nice hook, freak introduction to Leon and an amazing ending. Reading this makes me want to write something as good. Well done.
It was coursing through his down his shoulder,
Wow, this was an amazing chapter. This is is actually good enough to serve as an opening chapter, it has a nice hook, freak introduction to Leon and an amazing ending. Reading this makes me want to write something as good. Well done.
It was coursing through his down his shoulder,
2/22/2020 c27 WolfGoesBaa
I don't really care much for this whole prophecy, destiny and fate kind of talk. I've watched too many things involving that which has just left a bad taste in my mouth. I'm looking at you Star Wars and Naruto! But I like how vague this is and how we don't exactly know Kel's part in it, if he has one indeed. So there is wiggle room still.
This World Kong lore sounds interesting. Hopefully you'll build upon it and we can find out more about it.
I don't really care much for this whole prophecy, destiny and fate kind of talk. I've watched too many things involving that which has just left a bad taste in my mouth. I'm looking at you Star Wars and Naruto! But I like how vague this is and how we don't exactly know Kel's part in it, if he has one indeed. So there is wiggle room still.
This World Kong lore sounds interesting. Hopefully you'll build upon it and we can find out more about it.
2/22/2020 c26 WolfGoesBaa
"I don't care."
Probably the 3 words Elaphron's potential love interests habe heard from him. And what's with him plucking fur from Nekomura without even do much as a warning... The beastkin I see right, he should be in jail. Now I just wonder why Kel of all mahed was summoned here. Guess we'll find out when he is awake... That is if he regains consciousness
"I don't care."
Probably the 3 words Elaphron's potential love interests habe heard from him. And what's with him plucking fur from Nekomura without even do much as a warning... The beastkin I see right, he should be in jail. Now I just wonder why Kel of all mahed was summoned here. Guess we'll find out when he is awake... That is if he regains consciousness
2/22/2020 c25 WolfGoesBaa
There Alex goes, pulling on my heartstrings. So that's his motivation to learning magic, he genuinely wants to help. I like the wholeages are usually arrogant thing. I wonder if you borrowed that from fighter Pilots which I've heard are also very arrogant but they need to be to have the confidence of flying planes in war and thinking they can win in a dog fight.
I wish the fight was a bit more serious, at least so we get to see Alex use some spells but alas, you built the mystery of it all rather nicely. So good job!
There Alex goes, pulling on my heartstrings. So that's his motivation to learning magic, he genuinely wants to help. I like the wholeages are usually arrogant thing. I wonder if you borrowed that from fighter Pilots which I've heard are also very arrogant but they need to be to have the confidence of flying planes in war and thinking they can win in a dog fight.
I wish the fight was a bit more serious, at least so we get to see Alex use some spells but alas, you built the mystery of it all rather nicely. So good job!
2/22/2020 c24 WolfGoesBaa
Hey. Congratulations on breaking your previous record. You've written a really good story here. And considering that there ate more chapters, I'd say you've smashed your record!
Hey. Congratulations on breaking your previous record. You've written a really good story here. And considering that there ate more chapters, I'd say you've smashed your record!
2/20/2020 c21 WolfGoesBaa
Okay... Seems Cross is suffering from a serious case of Dracophobia*.
Dracophobia - a made up word meaning an irrational fear and hatred of dragons and sub species of dragons. (Although I doubt a fear of dragons can ever be irrational)
I'm glad they all met up!,Its great to see all these characters playing off each other. You're doing a good job so far. This is so far shaping up to be my favourite part of the story. It's been so long that I had to read snippets of the story to remind myself who everyone was. Ah... And here are the things 8 believe can be improved upon:
had alerted a nest of [them to the Squires' passing.] - (should end with either them or Squire's passing)
still snapping [and] snarling, [and] drooling [and] whining
Okay... Seems Cross is suffering from a serious case of Dracophobia*.
Dracophobia - a made up word meaning an irrational fear and hatred of dragons and sub species of dragons. (Although I doubt a fear of dragons can ever be irrational)
I'm glad they all met up!,Its great to see all these characters playing off each other. You're doing a good job so far. This is so far shaping up to be my favourite part of the story. It's been so long that I had to read snippets of the story to remind myself who everyone was. Ah... And here are the things 8 believe can be improved upon:
had alerted a nest of [them to the Squires' passing.] - (should end with either them or Squire's passing)
still snapping [and] snarling, [and] drooling [and] whining
1/9/2020 c38 4Unbreakable Ark
Hopefully with time the young mages will overcome their weaknesses, Kel his overconfidence and Alex his tendency to falter in battle. With any luck, this chapter's defeat will only strengthen them! Good to see you posting, as always.
4Unbreakable ArkHopefully with time the young mages will overcome their weaknesses, Kel his overconfidence and Alex his tendency to falter in battle. With any luck, this chapter's defeat will only strengthen them! Good to see you posting, as always.
1/8/2020 c38 12Dark Oracle
The stubbornness of youth, it's their downfall. Sooner or later, though, the two wayward apprentices will learn.
12Dark OracleThe stubbornness of youth, it's their downfall. Sooner or later, though, the two wayward apprentices will learn.
1/5/2020 c37 Dark Oracle
Heh, it's good to see you posting, I hope to be doing the same soon.
Looks like our intrepid apprentices are going to take a great deal of work before they get to their best.
Heh, it's good to see you posting, I hope to be doing the same soon.
Looks like our intrepid apprentices are going to take a great deal of work before they get to their best.
1/4/2020 c37 4Unbreakable Ark
And so, their training begins. Great chapter as always, and happy New Year as well as second anniversary of the story!
4Unbreakable ArkAnd so, their training begins. Great chapter as always, and happy New Year as well as second anniversary of the story!
10/3/2019 c36 1LazyHermit
Yay new chapter, I have been read through over and over again.
The part: [people on the streets noticed Kel screaming at the fenced house and shook their head.] is feels a bit off.
Perhaps the fence bar shaking should come first, the shouting and rattling is more attention grabbing.
something like this:
[]
Kel snorted. "Geez," Kel mumbled, "I thought the Wizard told you I'd be here..."
"Hey!" Kel roared, wrapping his hands around the fence bars and shaking them vigorously. "Let me in!"
People on the streets noticed Kel screaming at the fenced house and shook their head. Everyone knew the mage inside was rather reclusive.
* "Fuck you then!" so he turn around and walk away. Kel was not in the mood for joke, Especially if he was the butt of them...(Story continue)
[]
Personally, I rather prefer this at the (*):
[]
"Fuck you then!"
Kel turn around, took a few step back and recall the most powerful spell that he knew, before raising his hand. He was not in the mood for joke, especially if he was the butt of them.
[]
People (especially Guys) get more physical when they reach " Fuck you" stage.
1LazyHermitYay new chapter, I have been read through over and over again.
The part: [people on the streets noticed Kel screaming at the fenced house and shook their head.] is feels a bit off.
Perhaps the fence bar shaking should come first, the shouting and rattling is more attention grabbing.
something like this:
[]
Kel snorted. "Geez," Kel mumbled, "I thought the Wizard told you I'd be here..."
"Hey!" Kel roared, wrapping his hands around the fence bars and shaking them vigorously. "Let me in!"
People on the streets noticed Kel screaming at the fenced house and shook their head. Everyone knew the mage inside was rather reclusive.
* "Fuck you then!" so he turn around and walk away. Kel was not in the mood for joke, Especially if he was the butt of them...(Story continue)
[]
Personally, I rather prefer this at the (*):
[]
"Fuck you then!"
Kel turn around, took a few step back and recall the most powerful spell that he knew, before raising his hand. He was not in the mood for joke, especially if he was the butt of them.
[]
People (especially Guys) get more physical when they reach " Fuck you" stage.
9/26/2019 c36 12Dark Oracle
Nice to see you posting again, Cross! I've been eagerly awaiting more of Kel and Cross' adventure!
12Dark OracleNice to see you posting again, Cross! I've been eagerly awaiting more of Kel and Cross' adventure!
9/26/2019 c36 4Unbreakable Ark
I did somehow expect the mysterious Yuran to be an attractive woman, but I didn't expect Alex to reappear so soon! You're really keeping us on our toes, here. Good to see you writing again, keep up the amazing work!
4Unbreakable ArkI did somehow expect the mysterious Yuran to be an attractive woman, but I didn't expect Alex to reappear so soon! You're really keeping us on our toes, here. Good to see you writing again, keep up the amazing work!