for Tetsujin3/8/2018 c1 
5The Writer Anonymous
Good Day! This is the Writer Anonymous from the Review Game!
On a more user-to-user note, I’ve read a few of your works so far as a reviewer and writer on Fictionpress, and let me say, they’re good. Your writing style tells the story correctly yet does not drag on. And this work does not fail to reach the standards you’ve set with your other works like “Liarsenic” and “The Man in the Field”
Anyway, this story is honestly very well written like your other works and I see not many real flaws. Ryu’s character is well-developed so far, having experienced the hell of the Second World War and also having some conservatism within him and a preference for the old ways. I also find that he is quite bent on the idea of justice and from the looks of it may become the “ends justify the means” morality character.
As a side note, I also like the portrayal of Japanese culture here, 80s Japanese culture specifically. And as another side remark, your choice of song is spot on for characterization and with reality. “Kung Fu Fighting” was apparently released in 1976 (which even I didn’t know despite having it pumped into my ears every now and then).
Seeing this work is somewhat incomplete so far, I look forward to what you could turn this story into in the future. Especially considering the premise, this work has potential.
Thanks for the read!
5The Writer AnonymousGood Day! This is the Writer Anonymous from the Review Game!
On a more user-to-user note, I’ve read a few of your works so far as a reviewer and writer on Fictionpress, and let me say, they’re good. Your writing style tells the story correctly yet does not drag on. And this work does not fail to reach the standards you’ve set with your other works like “Liarsenic” and “The Man in the Field”
Anyway, this story is honestly very well written like your other works and I see not many real flaws. Ryu’s character is well-developed so far, having experienced the hell of the Second World War and also having some conservatism within him and a preference for the old ways. I also find that he is quite bent on the idea of justice and from the looks of it may become the “ends justify the means” morality character.
As a side note, I also like the portrayal of Japanese culture here, 80s Japanese culture specifically. And as another side remark, your choice of song is spot on for characterization and with reality. “Kung Fu Fighting” was apparently released in 1976 (which even I didn’t know despite having it pumped into my ears every now and then).
Seeing this work is somewhat incomplete so far, I look forward to what you could turn this story into in the future. Especially considering the premise, this work has potential.
Thanks for the read!
2/26/2018 c1 17Encore19
Uh oh! Ryu has the kind of restless discontent that's going to make him do something dangerous. And considering he has those yakuza "friends" I think things could get out of hand very soon. I wonder what the correct answer is for Ryu's discontent. Really embrace Budo and try to find peace with what he can't control and make positive changes so he enjoys his life more? That doesn't seem like the path he's going to walk down. Anyway...
I really liked your style of writing. 80s Japan is neat, I know enough from school to recognize most of the words and culture stuff so yay for me. How you described the fluid motions of the karate training was my favorite part. The metaphors and stuff, that's effective writing.
Stuff I didn't like... the feel of this is quite melancholic, understandably cause we have the crime and Ryu's discontent which is displayed very well. But is there gonna be magic in this? The summary seems to imply so. I would've needed some magicy stuff to happen in the first chapter for it to really hook me in, for me.
17Encore19Uh oh! Ryu has the kind of restless discontent that's going to make him do something dangerous. And considering he has those yakuza "friends" I think things could get out of hand very soon. I wonder what the correct answer is for Ryu's discontent. Really embrace Budo and try to find peace with what he can't control and make positive changes so he enjoys his life more? That doesn't seem like the path he's going to walk down. Anyway...
I really liked your style of writing. 80s Japan is neat, I know enough from school to recognize most of the words and culture stuff so yay for me. How you described the fluid motions of the karate training was my favorite part. The metaphors and stuff, that's effective writing.
Stuff I didn't like... the feel of this is quite melancholic, understandably cause we have the crime and Ryu's discontent which is displayed very well. But is there gonna be magic in this? The summary seems to imply so. I would've needed some magicy stuff to happen in the first chapter for it to really hook me in, for me.