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for Between Aliens and younger brothers

11/3/2018 c5 Guest
I enjoyed it Zac
11/3/2018 c4 Guest
I really enjoyed the cliffhanger.
11/3/2018 c3 Guest
It's very good.
7/27/2018 c5 Anne Messervy
Very clever!
7/26/2018 c5 1katniss15
That is quite good. I loved how Michael fought all the Greys. Lucy's on board? That isn't good. Loved this one and am looking forward to the sequel.
7/20/2018 c4 katniss15
This is really good! It is really funny how Ash mistook Michael and Zac for reptilians! You don't need to say anything about how you keep going to do the last chapter, but it gets too long as that is none of the readers concern. And you don't need to apologise for ending the chapters on cliffhangers as that is good because it keeps people reading longer. Yes, I am enjoying your story.
7/18/2018 c3 Anne Messervy
Well done! Very funny!
7/17/2018 c3 katniss15
This is really good! Ash is a bit stupid. Wonder what's going to happen now?
7/11/2018 c2 katniss15
That is the best chapter of this story! Action, humour. Looking forward to the next one!
7/7/2018 c1 katniss15
A great start to an interesting tale. You left out some words, so it got somewhat confusing, but it is really good. When's the next chapter coming?
7/7/2018 c1 Goonipers
It was a bit confusing, and he shot them dead instead of injuring them.

You don't need 'he was clearly' twice, you just need to describe what they were wearing.

You also wrote 'Zac officer sighed' and I think you meant 'The officer sighed'. The last big paragraph block at the end was also confusing. You could have broken it up a tad.

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