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5/18 c8 1gastrointestinal distress
this is a really good story, you do a great job of building the suspense and mystery around around the place. looking forward to reading more.
5/6 c7 4Mercury Angel II
I'm not sure if Stacey is having a dream or if it's reality. Maybe it's paranormal activity.
5/6 c6 Mercury Angel II
Group therapy sounds like a good idea. Talking to other people might be therapeutic for Stacey.
5/4 c5 Mercury Angel II
Hi, I like your story so far. I'm glad that Gorgonio somehow managed to get away from the monster and stay alive until the orderlies found him. Also, I'm happy to see that Stacey has made progress in recovering. I can see that she is more cheerful now because she is fantasizing about a guy. That was funny.
4/30 c4 Mercury Angel II
What a cliffhanger! I wasn't expecting to see a monster pop out in this story. I'm looking forward to seeing how he got away from the monster.
4/30 c3 Mercury Angel II
After Stacey receives her treatment, she should be able to tell the difference between a hallucination and reality. Since she's already taking pills, I think it's possible that she did sense someone lurking in the woods. You can't rule out that possibility because there's a lot of room in the forests for someone to hide in there.
4/30 c2 Mercury Angel II
It seems like sometimes Stacey is hallucinating, but other times she might not be seeing things. There are wild animals living in the woods, so it's possible that she wasn't imagining things when she detected something lurking in the forests.
10/14/2018 c1 18A Lovestruck A2
Hello there, I'm doing a bunch of reviews here, hoping to offer some constructive criticism instead of flames or vague praise. If anything I say seems harsh, know that I'm not trying to attack you or your work and believe wholeheartedly that improvements make a story great

I liked the very vivid description you gave for Stacy's hallucination. It is quite chilling and makes you really feel her terror.

[This was only the latest episode in five years, but it was by far the most violent]

Five years she's had these episodes? And no one thought to take her for treatment? I find that part a little hard to believe. If my child was continually having these hallucinations, I'd have taken them to get help far sooner.

This also was really short. If this is meant to be a prologue, I can understand why. But if it's for the first proper chapter, it's a little insubstantial for just one chapter. Remember, your first chapter is your opportunity to really hook an audience.

The vision was done well. I'm just not too ecstatic about the ending. Has it always been the same vision? What else has she seen?

Still, I'll drop a follow on this one. Don't be afraid to PM me if you have any questions. I'm here to help.

Best,
-DPL

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