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3/25 c8 15Charmpanda
Well ... this was a chapter just filled with unfortunate events. Just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse, now Lowell had to go and empathy lock himself to Emily. It’s early, and I’m way too at peace to get worked up over Cosmina. I’ll tell you what though, an amnesty judge would be lovely to balance out her sentences. I mean, those crimes took place such a while ago, and Cato’s already been punished for all of them. She should only punish him for using his magic last night, and even then it was to save someone. But hey, I’m not an adjudicator. Interesting to know that Cato killed Cassia’s parents. And here I thought I knew everything about him. I wonder what they’ll do now that Lowell’s run away, and what secrets the Gelviria garden has for Emily. I’ve always taken an interest in underworld and hellish themes, call me weird, so I’ll be excited to see what she learns. All right, this was a rather action packed chapter, and it went by fast. I’m eager to see what you’ve got planned next.
11/22/2019 c7 Charmpanda
Okay so, Vanemy died. Yeesh, look out for Lazarus. Like, woe. Geez. Knowing he killed her for no reason is really agitating me. Could he at least have taken her heart or something? So her death wasn’t in complete vain? I’m so mad, and ... taken back? Don’t really know what I’m feeling honestly. Sick? That was shocking. With that said, I don’t hate Lazarus as much as I’m hating Cosmina. I’m sad that Vanemy died without purpose. But why the hell Cosmina have to come salting the wound with her petty self? Sorry we broke the law Cosmina! You’re so right! We should’ve just died and let Lucien take over the world instead! ABSOLUTELY! How awful do you have to be to arrest a victimized student after an evil spirit just killed her friend for no honest to god reason!? I’m. Going. To. Cry. Tears of anger. Right now. Hhhhhhhhhhh ...
So, it’s safe to say that the ball wasn’t what I expected. I mean, the villains showed up sooner than I thought and a ton of crap just happen. I’m still rather satisfied with all the character interactions though. Emily thinking Kirron gorgeous was perfect, and Eskel in a dress? MARVELOUS! Bryson can heal? Ah dass lit!
Welp, this felt a lot shorter than ten thousand words. Guess the action really flew by. Wonderful work. I see why you were so eager to write this. It was quite heavy, wasn’t it? Why is Lazarus such a creep? Oh yeah, I CAN NOT BELIEVE HE KILLED LANDIS! Landis, the poor buttercup. Oh, and Laramine is such a diva, and Lowell a thug. They’d make such a funny anime boy group. The perv, the princess, and the punk.
So, I’ve just kinda been rambling to make myself feel better. I’m really sad, gonna start crying. I hope Spandel’s there to back up our poor perpetrators next chapter. I’m excited to see what unfolds next, so try and update quickity Kay?
Good job Love
10/28/2019 c6 Charmpanda
Finally! The chapter leading up to the Eldoria ball. You can finally satisfy your alacrity and write it. At least, I’m pretty sure that’s what you told me. I’ll have Kirron’s form to you quickly. I don’t have a lot to say, though it was a good chapter.
This is going to sound beyond strange, but I think my favorite scene was that of the villains. I dunno, I really like Laramine’s personality. He’s cute, and seeing Lowell bully him is somehow entertaining, pacifying, and pitying. Those two are like brothers, in some extreme extent of violence. I just loved it.
Ha, I knew that wasn’t Cato from the very beginning. He was too energetic. And since when does he smile? But seriously, what a creepy thing to do. Cato is my favorite character. I don’t wanna be dramatic, but I’d die for Cato. Soooooooo, back off Landis.
“Officer Phillips.” “Mr. Phillips.” Guuuuuuggggghhhhhh! Stop! He’s my rebellious little baby who loves sweets, and animals, and has suffered through hell! Calling him by professional names is so McFlippin’ strange! He’s like 19! This bothers me, just as much as it’s bothering him.
Emma is so nice. Jasper is frustrating me. Landis is getting pushy. I’m adopting Laramine as a brother. I’d date Cato if he wasn’t so many years older than me. And ... what the heck? Eskel was a surprise. :)
Great job! Super excited for what’s next. Make the update speedy Kay? :D
10/9/2019 c5 Charmpanda
JASPERRRRRRRRRR! WHAT. ARE. YOU. DOING?! ... ... ... oh boy. This couldn’t get any worse.
Ahhhhh, my Cato Spandel moment was so short lived, but I loved it for all of its ten seconds. I really just take so much pity on Cato. As if he didn’t have enough trouble, now Cosmina has another reason to beat him. Gaggghhhhh! I’m excited to see what happens with this subplot though. What’ll happen with Cato, Landis, and Spandel. Can I just, steel,Cato from you by the way? I’d take immaculate care of him if Spandel doesn’t beat me to it.
God, hearing Spandel addressed as Mr. Phillips is so dang weird.
All the villains have L names. Good thing I was too nervous about asking to submit Chairice then. He wouldn’t fit. I quite enjoy Laramine; and am more than eager to play around with him in Seals of Amber, though his morbid hobby even startles me. I find his dislike for human and Equis clothing pretty cute, for some reason. I wonder how Lowell will react to his failure in capturing a human.
Anyways, you’ve done a good job with this story as always. I hope I can expect a quick update. I’m eager for the Eldoria ball, but I’m honestly pretty satisfied with anything that goes on here. This was a long chapter, but it honestly felt super short to me. I can’t wait for what’s next! Great work and update soon!

I don’t feel like this review fully expressed my enjoyment of this chapter, so I apologize.
7/31/2019 c4 Charmpanda
Nope, nope, and nope! NO! NO! Have I said this enough? NO! NOOOOOO! I am so riled up and pissed off right now! Oh my god! My heart is just pounding I’m so mad! Listen to me, I know what Cato is feeling right now. He’s almost like a blind or visually impaired individual. His cat is the closest thing he has to sight, his only form of security, just like my sister, cane, and to be guide dog is for me and people like me! I don’t even care that she was hurting him, but for Cosmia to remove his only sense of security and only companion, to make him vulnerable in a way that no one else understands? That’s awful! Like, this just really hits me because I know that feeling! Ohhh, my poor baby. This is so cruel. Cosmia has officially landed second on my list of cruel beings, right under Cray! I did not think, that when you said she bent the rules, you meant like this. Aaaaaaaaaaaggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh! Cato! Come here.*hugs him and refuses to let go* Honestly right when she grabbed his cat, I’m just like, “Excuse me? What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Ooooooooo, I can’t stand her. No, I mean, she’s an awesome character. Excellent dynamic, took me by surprise, but oh my dear goodness she has me so mad. So, so mad. Like, I’m only just now calming down. I just somehow need to be manifested into this story so I can take care of that boy. Oh, oh poor thing.
Okay, I’m sorry, but that was just a VERY powerful scene for me. Hit me back home Dog. Excellent job. I am genuinely invested in this story. Y’know, it’s six thousand words, but it feels far more like two thousand. Everything went by so quickly, especially that last scene there. I loved it all! It was a rollercoaster. I’m so eager to see everyone and their relationships progress.
Landis is like my dad, a good person but tenaciously sticks to his own opinions. It’s a shame though, because I adore Landis but not so much that quality.
Eek! Jasper is heartbroken! Luka, Victoria, can you guys ease up on my baby? He’s just a kid all right? I feel terrible for Spandel, and I know the next few days are going to be rough for him and Jasper.
Valerian! Hey Baby Doll! This was a perfect intro for him honestly, the dreamy guitar player. Bloom meats Musa. Hee, kidding! :) Aaaaaaaanyways, great work! Excellent job! And congratulations! This chapter made me sad, angry, and cheerful, all at one’s. I eagerly await the next update, so make it fast! :DDDDDDDDD Please?
7/9/2019 c3 Charmpanda
Okeydokey! You’ve written a bunch in the past while, you and Pandore both. Geez, I feel so very unproductive. Oh well, it happens, doesn’t it? Amazing work with this story. Not even kidding, this could be an actual story, like published outside of this site, due to its incredible world development, plot, and character design. Seriously, I adore the characters in this story. They’re all so diverse and unique in design. That’s so Lovely and special. HEEEEEE! LOVE TO DARIA! She’s adorable! Gosh, Victoria’s so strict. Three minutes. Do you understand the trouble I’d be in if I were punished every time I was three minutes late? Hecks! My Spandel is sooooo cute! I lurve him! God, I just wanna see all my Awromian characters in this story! Like Neveah, and Chairice, and Çécio,, Monocrome Myth reminds me so much of Awromott. They’re both very magical, full of history, cheerful, and littered with unique characters. Really, I should send you a chapter. It makes me feel so happy and melty to read this because of it.
EEEEEEEEEKKKK! Brooklyn died! No way! Oi *sharp breath* How shocking ... who’s gonna tell Jasper?
Awwwww, Landis *pouts* C’mon, ease up Kid. Poor Cato’s dying here. I love his name by the way. Cato Oslyn? That sounds so pretty.
Excited for this ball thingy, and just about everything else in this story. Excellent work! Love the long chapters! Update ASAP! :D
6/19/2019 c2 Charmpanda
Well, that was quite the ending. Such a doomy turn in contrast to the usual joy.
Once again, you’ve done quite the impressive job with this chapter. I’m really pumped about this story, and it’s really making me miss Awromott despite their severe differences. The perfect, jovial, magical ambiance you put into Equis is really amazing. I do indeed just feel like I’ve been transported there.
Awwwwww, poor Jasper. The kid’s really suffering. I feel pretty bad for him. GET a new girlfriend. Harder than it sounds I know, but Honey, do you really deserve this.? I. Think. Not. I wonder how he gets roped into Equis, assuming he does. Lily too. That joke shared between them was so cute. Love it.
Aha! Vanemy Annabella Rose has made her first appearance! Kyaaaaaaa! As Pandore would say. But really, I’m too eager to find out more. I want to know EVERYTHING!
MORE LOVE TO MAYA!
I wonder why that eline dislikes Emily?
I’m intrigued. Fabulous work Cheesecake. I encourage you to update soon so I can find out more! Excellent wor!
6/10/2019 c1 Charmpanda
Maybe I don’t show it much, but I’m a super egotistical person. Soooooo, it’s kinda hard for me to admit that ... THIS MIGHT JUST BE ONE OF THE GREATEST FIC IDEAS YOU AND I HAVE HAD COMBINED! I mean ... it’s awesome, you’ve done a fantastic job! This first chapter was incredible. It exceeded all my expectations. I don’t think you’ve ever made such a lengthy and voluminous chapter. I love it. I’m going to kiss it. Put it in my pocket. Really, I’m proud of you. And your descriptions have rivaled mine today. I’m kind of angry that you did so well, especially the forest descriptions. But, excellent work. I can’t put how impressed I am into words. :) You go Girl!
Sooooooo, this lovely woman who descended from the sky and then vanished? Okeydokey. I’m wondering about that. The history of Equis is quite rich. Hopefully we’ll get more incite to it.
YyyyyyyyeH, Lily is super very uptight. Is she a mage too? Valerian’s here, so I imagine so? Heyyyyyyyyy Jasper, how you doin Baby? Not good mmmm? Seeing as you’re dating an unfaithful woman. I laughed so hard when you mentioned a David being cheated on, considering my chapter of the Palace also mentioned a David being cheated on. Coincidence? I! Think! So! :D
LET’S HERE IT FOR BLACK CHARACTERS! I know that’s a really weird thing to say, but you don’t come across many warm skinned characters in fiction. I have a tom on Awromott, my sister’s universe, and in Descendants of the Midnight Moon. But yeah, you don’t find many warm skinned characters in media. It’s kinda sad for an African American like myself, so YAY FOR LANDIS AND CASSIA! THANKS! I really like Landis. He has that charming personality I like. Yeeeea! The sweetheart.
SPANDEL! I’m so glad to see you write with him. It’s been like twenty years. I don’t mind him as a council member. It shows a bit of the mom in him. He shipped with anyone?
Civilians walking animals? Does that mean familiars? Say yes!
Well, excellent work! I’m excited to see what happens next! Superfluously great job! Update quick for me.
6/10/2019 c1 Muimina
Very strong beginning here, nice work. I totally recommend anyone checking the reviews to give this story a read, assuming you care for adventure/fantasy, as I'd say it is worth it.

To go a little more in-depth, I'll break down my thoughts a bit. (Minor SPOILERS ahead).

To start, having opening exposition will always cause me to raise an eyebrow (or two!), however, I'd say it was handled well here. It didn't drag on needlessly and the information conveyed was actually interesting. I will add that I wonder how this knowledge will be imparted to the main character later, because right now readers know more than the protagonist about the history/world. I imagine it could potentially be done 'off-screen', while the protagonist is studying or in class etc, so I'm not really worried, but more so curious.

The writing itself had a number of typos, however, as it wasn't excessive by any means, I'd say it doesn't really detract from the reading experience. Further, the mistakes that were there were not anything huge, which means it was still easy to understand what was happening and what was being conveyed. I don't think me trying to get too into the technicalities of writing is the right thing to do here, as I feel such feedback is better kept separate from reviews (if it isn't a major issue), but also I'm no expert myself. So, suffice to say, I'd say the writing is good even if there is room for improvement (but let's be honest, isn't there always?).

As for the story, as mentioned early, it is a strong beginning. Bigger pieces get set in play, characters are introduced, the setting is established, information is learned, and, ultimately, the reader is engaged. I do wonder where the story will go, so I do hope more ends up written.

Further, (keep in mind I'm not really the best judge of this) for the pacing progress, it felt pretty good. Events played out, things happened, scenes flowed into one another, it all felt coherent and like it came together well.

I also liked the descriptions. For the locations (such as for the city & magic school) it really helped give the places a distinct feel. For the characters, I tend to be a bit iffy, as I have seen it done poorly too many times, but here I feel it was done right. The descriptions felt, simply put, descriptive. They didn't go overboard (I feel), and they done what they are supposed to do.

Overall, definitely worth a read, I'm curious to see where this goes.

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