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for The One That Got Away

8/21 c48 Someone
Wow this was a really good story! If you haven't considered it before I'd say see whether you can get this published... it is that good.

Sincerely,
Someone
4/26 c48 4Crepusculum
Wow. This is such a great story. I almost can't believe I just came here and stumbled upon it, as it usually takes more time to find something so good and so much to my liking.

Anyway, it was a wonderful story with truly likeable characters, except for those few, who weren't (meant to be). But you were right when you said in the beginning that no-one is really who they seem to be, at least it was so for Ian, Beth and Nate.

Ian is a bit too perfect (to be real, which he is not), although that's one of the reason I love reading such stories. He's a modern day prince charming, loyal to the end despite all the hardships along the way. In the end, it was him who didn't give up on Danielle.

Coming to Danielle, now she is a much more realistic character, yet someone easy to relate to. I thought I'd be thoroughly annoyed with her for "being stupid", but I actually understood her behaviour, at least in college. The adult Danielle was a little bit more frustrating.

I didn't mind the change of viewpoint, although I think it would have made more sense if the whole present part had been in Ian's point of view. I'm a bit sorry I didn't get to read the very end from Danielle's perspective, because her epiphany left me guessing a bit, why here and now, but not before; and did she really only now realise it, or had she been thinking about it before and now just finally managed to speak her mind.

There were some minor spelling and grammar mistakes, but not enough to stop me from enjoying the story. Which I did enjoy a lot. Thank you for writing this.
11/21/2021 c48 TGN
Thanks you for the story, I really liked it. I didn't pay for the story so I wanted at least to write a review.
11/20/2021 c48 13J.Kuzzey
Woo! Congratulations on finishing your first story on FictionPress! Excellently done! Ended with a happy ending so thank you for that. Definitely a rollercoaster of a story but that's how life is, isn't it? I think you did a fantastic job with the characters, as I've mentioned before. As frustrating as it was with them dancing around each other it was very realistic and they stayed true to the core of who they were to the very end. Writing was superb throughout. Again, great job. I hope to see another story from you in the future.
11/2/2021 c47 J.Kuzzey
Glad to see you're back updating (although I'm a few days late reviewing). I thought they might get into a car wreck there for a second thanks to Danielle going for Ian's pants while he was driving lol. That would've been a great story to tell the family. The ending of this chapter though, oof. Ian obviously in a post-coitus high, but as he said it's the truth for him. I'm not surprised Danielle didn't say it back but she can only go on about this so long. Hopefully Danielle's silence doesn't linger in the back of his mind for too long.
10/27/2021 c46 J.Kuzzey
[Tonight felt like a step forward...] It did. The conversation in the middle of the dance floor was so awkward, I really felt uncomfortable for them, having everyone discussing their personal life. Definitely got the sexual attraction going on full blast here, Ian didn't seem like he was going to make it haha. Definitely not a fan of Beth's man, going to be interesting to see where that subplot goes. Either way I'm glad to feel the progress for Ian and Danielle in this chapter, or at least what felt like it.
10/25/2021 c45 J.Kuzzey
Definitely a conversation that needed to happen here. I still feel like there's more to be hashed out but the main points were hit upon, and I'm sure Ian feels at least a little relieved that they were able to have that conversation. As difficult as it was maybe spending the holiday apart helped them realize how important saving their relationship is. Beth, though; definitely curious about that because as we all know she is the MVP, can't have anything happen to her.
10/23/2021 c44 J.Kuzzey
Beth still the MVP all these years later. It seems to me that her read on the situation is spot on. While it's unfortunate her appearance meant the conversation between Ian and Danielle was postponed because of Beth I think it was good she gave Ian her perspective, sometimes that outside view helps. I appreciate the moments between Ian and Danielle such as the hike here, with their conversation about his drawings and of course his thoughts were really introspective on their situation. It showed the day to day while still giving us insight into the big picture at the same time.
10/22/2021 c43 J.Kuzzey
Oh, man, I really felt for Ian there at that dinner scene. He definitely was blindsided and thought this was going a lot better than it really was. Credit to her dad for noticing but that's how parents are. Danielle is doing an excellent job at avoiding any serious conversation. I'm amazed she's so good at acting comfortable with the situation, because Ian makes it very clear he isn't happy in their little more-than-friends-not-quite-a-couple gray area she's having them linger in. It has to be in the back of her mind constantly. It's funny that before when the story was told from her perspective I was curious was going on in Ian's head and now that it's from Ian's perspective I'm wondering what's going on in her head, but luckily you did a good job portraying her thought process when it was her POV that I feel like I have a pretty good idea. Ian is right, honest communication is really what they need.
10/21/2021 c42 J.Kuzzey
Ian asking every chance he had a question that would hopefully lead to answers and her finding a way to not answer it was obviously driving Ian crazy for a bit there. I don't blame him for being skeptical considering how their relationship has been this entire time, and he's definitely in past the point of no return. Fortunately it looks like she's realizing it for herself, too. I'm never convinced it'll be easy going with this story, though, so I'm sure I'll find some drama in the next few chapters. As always I'm excited to see what happens but nervous because I want them to be happy!
10/12/2021 c41 J.Kuzzey
Finally. But why do I feel like despite them connecting right now something is going to get in the way again... Danielle caved (feels like she's been the hold out) but I worry that she might still be a little scared and scurry away. Is this an "in the moment" moment or will she decide now is the right time to pursue a relationship with him? It seems like seeing the story through Ian's perspective has shifted mine a little, which is great because that means you've done a great job capturing a whole new voice when you switched to his narration, that's not easy to do.
10/7/2021 c40 J.Kuzzey
[...it was almost torture...] I can feel the torture! In a good way, of course. Once more they're so close, right on the edge of moving to the next step. It's unfortunate it had to come at such a sad cost and because Ian was grieving, but it does go to show that she's so connected with him that she understood how important Mr. Davis was for him and she was there for him when he needed her. Definitely feeling the shift in this chapter toward something more (once more). They clearly need each other.
10/6/2021 c39 J.Kuzzey
["I wish... for a burger."] Ahhhh! I mean, fair, burgers are good, but the games these two are playing. Ian is fully aware of the tension between the two of them so I imagine she's feeling it, too. I'm sure it won't last long. I've been wondering who would break first, and I believed it would be Ian, but now I'm not too sure who will be the first to make a move. She keeps treading on dangerous territory thinking they can stay as friends.
10/3/2021 c38 J.Kuzzey
Ahh the tension this chapter was insane. It seems obvious she still is interested in him as more than a friend, and as we can see that's what Ian is picking up on, too. I understand her want to be just friends for a bit, but they're both having such a tough time maintaining that line. So tense. Something's gotta give. The question is when.
9/30/2021 c37 J.Kuzzey
Let me start by saying I liked the perspective change here. Typically, I hate perspective changes in first person POV stories, but that's because a lot of writers these days shove like two or three (sometimes more) perspectives into one chapter and it's annoying because nothing settles long enough for me to care. Here, you've spent the entire time telling her perspective, so it was a nice change of pace to get into his head. It was also a good review of everything that's happened thus far, or at least what he would consider the main points. I like the labels, too, for each specific memory and how he feels it fits into their relationship. This made me appreciate him more than I already did. But that last bit! Ah, you weren't wrong about higher highs and lower lows. I can't only imagine where this is going. Looking forward to the next chapter now that I'm caught up!
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