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11/19/2021 c1 9Mislav
Very creepy and intense horror story. I really enjoyed reading it. Great build-up and attention to details. I especially liked how you described the house. This was a nice touch: "Ramson House was everything I expected it to be, from the long gravel driveway that led to the front of the house from the black iron gates, to the thorny rose bushes in the overgrown gardens. It looked like it had been taken straight out of a book-whether fairytale or gothic horror, I had yet to decide." Even the name was sinister; Ransom House. I read it as "Ransom" at first. I also really liked how you added this detail about London, and then moved on to describe Julius: "I paid my fare and thanked the driver before alighting the cab. He sped away as soon as I was out of the door. It was so typical of London. Everyone was in such a rush. Not Julius Ramson, however. He was smiling at me serenely as he waited for me by the door. If he was bothered by the fact that I was ten minutes late, then he didn't show it. He had his hands in the pockets of his suit trousers, and he was leaning back ever so slightly against one of the marble pillars that framed the door. It was a relaxed yet confident pose. The pose of a man who had all the time (and money) in the world."

Good touch with all the rooms being cold, except for Ada's room; obviously, Armand and Julius don't need the heat. Such an interesting (and terrifying) new take on vampires; vampires that don't only drink human blood to feed, but also to preserve their immortality/eternal youth. And they don't kill their victims right away; instead, they slowly drink their blood and thus steal their youth, until they grow old and die. "Leech vampirism", like the first reviewer said.

Poor Ada. She was very nice and I really felt sorry for her. Good idea to write the story in the first person, it made it even more effective. These are the horror stories that I like: interesting premise, likeable protagonist and a bitter end. This line was chilling: "I reached down to pull the thick duvet over my body, but stopped when I caught sight of my hands and let out a small shriek. They were bony, aged, not the hands of someone in their twenties."

I liked the reveal at the end, where Armand tells Ada that the portraits of the women were the portraits of his previous victims. Keep up the great work. I will definitely read your other stories.
11/16/2021 c1 1Jhenrhi Ida
I really liked this story and the idea of a life leech vampirism. I was able to figure it out right away what was happening to Ada and I'm sure it could have gone further if you wanted to. Either way, I enjoyed it and love stuff like this.

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