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for How To Fall In Love In 24 Hours

12/28/2021 c13 anna Marry
can't wait to read the next story, i really like it, i am an editor from fast growing platform, may i know hoe to reach you professionally?
12/16/2021 c13 13J.Kuzzey
Fantastic job with the narration this chapter. I really felt the dread for lack of a better term; the impending sense of parting that was coming upon them. Although it was only a little over a day for the two of them here, they certainly built a bond. As I've said the chemistry was very well done. I could feel it. So it makes this parting that much more painful. It was easy to root for them. I think in that regard you nailed the most important aspect of the story. Overall it was an easy, fun, engaging read. No complaints. Looking forward to the next part (which I see you've already started!)
12/13/2021 c12 J.Kuzzey
Oh, poor Beth. An unfortunate reality for too many people, and the way culture can have such a detrimental impact on the youth is sadly very accurate. I think the argument that takes place here is in line with how this story has been going, and from beginning to makeup sex ending was very in character for both of them. You did a good job maintaining the chemistry between them despite the argument which is never easy to do.
12/12/2021 c11 J.Kuzzey
You did such a good job building an emotional connection between them already that going into this chapter its fairly obvious this has all the potential to grow into so much more than a one night stand, and they're aware of it, too. Their personalities came through in how they approached being physically intimate with each other. Beth's internal panic was amusing; she's caught feels but is having the hardest time admiting that to herself.
12/11/2021 c10 J.Kuzzey
I think you did a good job illustrating how they're both very comfortable with each other but also very excited around each other this chapter, for lack of better descriptors haha. Also great job with the narration this chapter, showing how Beth is having the internal struggle of how this is such a bizarre, unexpected turn of events but not in a bad way. Obviously any time you start feeling something new for someone new it rattles you a bit, even more so given the circumstances here, and the way she's reacting to it makes sense given her character.
12/9/2021 c9 J.Kuzzey
Beth? Wow a lot of the personality quirks make sense. I know I've said this like every review and you're probably sick of hearing it but the chemistry is really spot on. They're sharing a lot about each other but it doesn't feel forced, it feels like it's the natural direction the conversation would take each time. It's funny how this is actually not a long period of time but it's starting to feel like a slow burn lol. But not in a bad way at all, the entire plot is flowing very naturally. And as I've said before the dialogue remains witty and free-flowing.
12/7/2021 c8 J.Kuzzey
At first I thought, "finally," then realized even though it's been like 7 chapters they haven't actually known each other that long, lol. Then he put a stop to it and I thought, "oh, not finally at all." You've done a good job taking the one-night stand scenario and twisting it into something more emotionally intimate, so we can see the foundation for how this has the potential to become so much more. I'm sure I've said this like 100 times already but I do enjoy your use of first person narration, you've got it down to an art.
12/6/2021 c7 J.Kuzzey
Wow there is a lot unloaded this chapter! Abusive exes, dead siblings, kids, family drama... and somehow throughout it all it feels like this conversation is happening between people who have known each other for more than a few hours, which I suppose is proof of how well you've done with the chemistry (as I've said before). She's really good at gently pushing the direction of their conversation back to where she originally intended when this all first started, as we see with her taking the "what are you passionate about" question and running with it, but he's good at keeping up with her, and that banter is always fun.
12/2/2021 c6 J.Kuzzey
[He was perceptive... which was quite rare for men. No offense.] Haha where's the lie, though. Hmm Lizzie coming out of a shitty relationship that lasted a bit is unfortunate, it's too bad such situations exist honestly. Dylan coming from a long-term relationship that was on a constant downhill run is also unfortunate. The positive is they're both out of those situations and healing. Again the dialogue is great, really shows who the characters are through how they speak, respond to questions, etc. You wrote good and fun chemistry between them.
11/29/2021 c5 J.Kuzzey
[Wow, they were so cringeable.] This made me laugh way too hard because it's 100% something I would say. Nothing worse than when you're being harassed in an establishment and security is nowhere to be found and no one around says anything. Dylan of course swoops in and wins the Nice Guy Award, that's a good way to win some points. Again the dialogue is on point, it gives good insight into the characters and as usual your first person narration is great. She went straight for suggesting the hotel she really does just want to the fling lol. Dylan seems like a solid guy so far, we'll see where this goes.
11/29/2021 c4 J.Kuzzey
Definitely love the dialogue/banter between the two this chapter. The back and forth was golden. Dialogue is a tricky thing because it can either be a waste or a good indicator of characters and their chemistry; I feel like you nailed it here, it was fun and a look into the characters sense of humor and style.
11/27/2021 c3 J.Kuzzey
I love the little blurb that starts each chapter, definitely gives it the handbook vibe. Per usual your narrating ability using first person POV is really good, like I can already get a feel for Lizzie as a character just from the way she's narrating the story. Looking forward to seeing where you take this. It's a good concept.
11/27/2021 c1 J.Kuzzey
Alright, let's gooo! I'll be dropping reviews along the way like always.

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