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1/17 c11 13J.Kuzzey
Beth mustering up the courage to admit first to herself and then to him what she really wanted is definitely measurable and believable growth from where she was in the beginning. Feels like a reward as a reader, too, ha! Again the dialogue feels very believable and real which definitely sucked me in. That phone call where Dylan seemed cold had me nervous for a moment, a testament to what a ride this has been. Looking forward to checking out the next part.
1/14 c10 J.Kuzzey
Well, sometimes the best way to know if you're missing someone is to try someone else's company for a bit and that's exactly what Beth did here. I think it was more to confirm than to forget - confirm that she can't forget, rather. I'm not sure if it was because this is a first person POV story (and as I've said before, very well done with the narration) or if I just genuinely didn't like Kevin in the brief time spent with him here, but I'm glad she told him off at the end, haha. It's interesting because in moments like this I always wonder if I'm being swayed by the first person narration and I probably am, but that makes it enjoyable.
1/13 c9 J.Kuzzey
Okay THIS chapter was a rollercoaster! It started out so cute and then the explosion of raw emotions took over. I think the way it turned into a fight was very realistic. It's easy for me as a reader to be an armchair matchmaker and tell them just to get together because it feels right, but in reality it's never that simple and Dylan being a dad does complicate it. There's more at stake than their own emotions because of that. Of course they need to settle on what exactly their own emotions are to begin with. This definitely can't be the end of them. I have to say you've done a good job getting me invested in their relationship. Excited and nervous to see how this plays out from here.
1/6 c8 J.Kuzzey
The chemistry is evident here again. It's giving me a rollercoaster ride of emotions, because I'm cheering for them as a couple because it's obvious they're a good match, but the ups and downs, the uncertainty of it all is nerve-racking (which is good! means I'm invested). Dylan is obviously a wonderful dad. I love that they're open and vulnerable with each other about a lot of important topics - I just wish they would be open about what they want for real! Overall, a great chapter, fun read, perfect for me to jump back into after being away for a bit.
12/31/2021 c7 J.Kuzzey
["It's so horrible I feel like punching her,"] that's a mood. Wow she is a terrible mother. Unfortunately there really are people out there like that. I can only imagine how Dylan feels, he's definitely coming across as a grade-A father. Beth coming through for him and being there for him when he needed it shows the level of their relationship; it's deeper than either wants to admit out loud. Interested in seeing how they maintain and grow their relationship from here. The last sentence shows how they're already impacting each other in such a huge, life-altering way.
12/28/2021 c6 J.Kuzzey
Beth trying to casually test Dylan's feelings on their relationship in the beginning there by mentioning the "steamy guy" is something I would've done even though that's never what works, so I was kind of laughing at first. It's better to ask outright - communication! Naturally she doesn't get the answer she was hoping for (and although she seems confused a little as to what she was hoping for, I think it's pretty clear what she wants deep down, she's just having trouble admitting that to herself. Have to admit it to yourself before you can say it out loud!).
Tough conversation for them this chapter, and while the issue of their feelings/situation/relationship title wasn't resolved entirely, it was a good starting point. Have to break the ground at some point and get into the meat of it and that's what it felt like they did here.
12/23/2021 c5 J.Kuzzey
I'm a sucker for good friendships and I love seeing that Dani and Beth's is still going strong, and the way you wrote it here is wonderful. Likewise the conversation with Ray was great, too; this was the "friendship chapter" and it's nice to see her relationships outside of Dylan. I think this was a good way to show Beth's internal struggle with trying to figure out what exactly her relationship with Dylan is - or what it could be. It's very obvious she wants it to be so much more but navigating that isn't simple, especially given all the many factors involved. Dialogue is 10/10 per usual. It's engaging and realistic enough that it gets me completely absorbed and suddenly the chapter is over. That's a good thing, though, it means I was 100% sucked in.
12/21/2021 c4 J.Kuzzey
Excited to see the friendship between Beth and Dani is still going strong. Familiar faces are like easter eggs to me, it's so fun to see them popping up in this story. The dialogue remains a strong point, the way it shifts slightly whether Beth is talking to Dylan or friends, for example, is subtle but noticeable. It's also fun and engaging, which is nice, as it makes the story flow easier. Everyone has a unique voice and I think that came through in this chapter especially well. They're both still seesawing on whether to make a go of it and be in a relationship but as I've said before it's understandable given their life situations, and doesn't feel contrived. They're an easy couple to root for, though.
12/19/2021 c3 J.Kuzzey
Both are definitely unsure about what kind of relationship they have but that's understandable given everything that's happened in such a short amount of time. They seem to want a definitive answer but also are nervous about doing so, which with their respective histories and life situations makes sense. Again the chemistry is evident, even after the time apart, and its easy to cheer for them. I think you've done a good job balancing all the different emotions that are involved here, and I'm a fan of the way their conversations feel natural.
12/16/2021 c2 J.Kuzzey
I see Beth has been dealing with the lovesick blues since the end of the last installment. I was wondering how the parting was going to impact them. I think you did a great job illustrating how she's been, how it impacted her, without wasting too much time on it. It felt like a great pace to start off with. You already did a good job establishing their chemistry and romance in the first installment so I'm looking forward to what the time apart means for them and what being reunited could bring.

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