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for Painting With Fire

6/6/2003 c1 14Kri
*whistles* goody goody gumdrops! That's quite an ending. ^.^ I also like that teacher's name, Mrs. Black, bwahahah sounds like a teacher name! Anyways, just one major thing that was bothering me, in the beginning (I didn't see this so much later on in the story, just mostly the 1st and 2nd paragraph) you start a lot of sentences with "She" or "Her" or something like that. What you should do is put some action in the start, and what can help with doing that is to shorten those sentences a little, cause quite a few of them are a long read! Also cutting apart sentences and making them shorter could add a bit more suspense as well, or a sense of urgency. Though all in all i liked the story, quite a bit of action and like i said before I really enjoy that ending.:P I hope you continue it!
5/1/2003 c1 24battygirl13
This is very good! keep writing! more! next chapter! hurry! :D
11/11/2001 c1 6Strider Hunter
Good story, Isis (and Demona?), although I think it could use a little tweaking. The way you used the present tense kinda detracts from the story as a whole; also, try to develop Tess's and the other characters' feelings and emotions a little; you know, what are they thinking at that moment, how do they feel? Anyway, bravo overall. I know a good effort when I see it, and you're IMMENSELY better than the writer I just reviewed a few minutes ago...sheesh! Keep it up!
10/20/2001 c1 Anonymous
Not a bad story. I liked it very much. very descriptive. Please keep writing!

A fan
8/30/2001 c1 8Ice Demon
Yo I'd say it was a good story. I think it was a good story becuase you told what the characters personality was.Like Lily likes to help people ouy and she is sometimes immature and Tess is just the same. In all I thought the story was interesting. Could you my newest story Evil Living Dead 3:The Lake.

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