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7/17/2006 c1 MarkPenn
It is very good but ask someone to help you with paragraphing it because I got lost a lot. 4.5 out of 5 stars.
7/29/2000 c1 George
Prank-players, huh? I like your use of the word "snorked." Also, interesting alien physique. Do you know why they evolved the way they did? I'd be interested to know. The plot is a little cliche, but keep adding. Come up with twists, such as an original reason for them being on earth (maybe they ran into another humanoid race that were invincible? Maybe, if that's true, Tev can talk her way out of it and assist them in finding a way to beat the other humans-nah, that doesn't work. Tev sounds a little too blonde.) I dunno. But so far, the story is good. Be sure to flesh out the personalities, and not just the visuals. Also, it's a little hard to follow without indents.
7/11/2000 c1 1FangTeng
Hmm...other than the fact that their is no spacing, and paragraphs, this story is... more than okay as introductions go for stories. Also, I wonder why people would make fun of the 20th and 21st century's. Usually olden times (14th century-17th century) are looked on as times of frontier and adventure, and I feel that teh 20th century was no different with Communist fears, hippie movements, and the fight against racism. However, I can see it being possible (a lot of things poke fun at old movies, and how the U.S. was so scared of Communists watching them from Sputnik). A few spelling and grammar errors. Some everyday sci-fi inventions, but at least you didn't go for the cliche Blade Runner type stuff.
7/8/2000 c1 1Veranda
Glo! You didn't tell me you had stories posted! How do you write such good sci-fi? *green with envy* I love it. Finish it or I'll be forced to write my own ending. Not a good thing...
7/5/2000 c1 3Air
Wow, that was interesting. I like how you gave your characters interesting names I could never do that. I got kinda of lost in the middle of it, but I sort of knew what was going on and don't make fun of our technology it may not be extremly easy to use but our scientists are doing their best. Anyway I like the story. Please continue.
7/3/2000 c1 5Gloria Fontaine
OK, my story got messed up and the spaces are screwy. Forgive me, at least this time the story doesn't have a billion little O's with lines and dots (I know nothing of IBM terminology) The STORY actually starts with the word Tevana.

I hope you are patient enough to decipher it until I figure this whole thing out.

THANK YOU AND MY APOLOGIES.

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