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for PleasurePainEmptinessSex

5/30/2006 c1 123Black and White Dreams
this was... odd... also, the rating is too low. K is for ages 5 and up! this is inappropriate for anyone under at least 13. You should change the rating before you get banned.

~Black and White Dreams~
5/17/2006 c1 5Ronin-N-Gang
Good poem. It really sends out the feeling.
6/6/2002 c1 hyper
that was so dumb where the hell did you get that stupid idea!
1/10/2002 c1 seventeens stalker
That was kinda disturbing. Not the poem, just the relationship. Very good, you should write more like this.
12/3/2001 c1 scarie faerie
Howdie ~*SeXiLy_EviL*~

Stunning poem. You express the subject of ~*PleasurePainEmptinessSex*~ so perfectly.

You can feel the passion and the lust of one of the involved, and the utter disgust and sickening feelings the other is experiencing.

I love the jutteriness (real word?) of the poem, the way you jump from one body part to a sensation e.t.c...



Mouth, warm and inviting"

It is extreamly sexual (which was obviously intentional *grin*) and gives the impression that the two of them are engaging in a sexual intercourse.

The finishing two lines are amazing. It's a cry for help, and also a threat.

"You've finished

I hadn't even started"

Can I just suggest though that you place a full stop/period after the word "finished" as it will feel sterner, more abrupt and more threatening. I won't be offened if you decide not to though, obviously. It was simply a suggestion. *smile*

Love, bruises, glitter and scars,

~*Scarie Faerie*~


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