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for The Red Star

8/11/2004 c1 14sunrise sparrow
its good to ryme only try to do it descretely (reffering to third poem) other than that i like em alot. its amazing that you can right three poems on one subject and make them all instresting and differnt and unique keep it up :)
12/31/2002 c1 Pam9
sad. and surprise - I liked the third one best ( rhymes ) Aren't you glad that no energy ever really passes away from our universe, that the Creator arranged everything so that energy only changes forms, never dies or gets used up?

Once again, lovely images you paint with your words, hermana, LOL even when they don't rhyme they create vivid images. You have real talent!
11/13/2002 c1 TLWROX
Wooo! I LOVE this little blurb:

"She clasps her cloak with slender fingers

Caresses the soft, smooth velvet

Envelops herself in its black folds

Which flow around her like raven wings"

AWESOME poems, girl! These were written a LONG time ago, too- I was never that talented... Lol! :) :) :)
3/31/2002 c1 LPluver4ever
omg...i loved those! specially the first one...sad...any way good writeing! keep up the good work!
3/16/2002 c1 54Werecat99
You're right the first one is enchanting! I was captivated from the first line. Great work!
3/8/2002 c1 159Heather Goldbug
First poem: 3rd and 4th stanzas rhyme. Be careful of that. I love the "liquid crystal"... Second poem: I like this one a LOT a lot... dying people must feel the same way. I looooove the "where do broken stars go?" part. ...Third poem: This one's funny. It's cute. It has an inconsistant rhyme pattern... not something I value. Even if it isn't a 1212 1212 1212 1212 poem, I think it should have an established poem like maybe 1212 12312 1212 12312 or whatever. You know? Yes, you do. I don't know if I could have rhymed it any better though, it's pretty good. I loooove the last three lines. Especially the And now the star will truly ... die.
2/4/2002 c1 10aziza
I have such a thing for descriptive language... This is amazing and gorgeous!
2/14/2001 c1 50orriel
very nice. the rhyming one is good! I don't really have any suggestions for you, so this is ummm...a pretty pointless review.
1/24/2001 c1 traeumenHerz
These three depictions live in their own way, and should not be compared. *gets off soapbox* Now that I'm done condemning unjustice, I must say that I love these poems. They are evocative, and brilliantly bright.
1/6/2001 c1 a8
Wow! Excellent! Write more! This is definitely going on my favorites list.

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