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for Chapter one: Initiation

1/20/2004 c1 4Ridea
WOW...thats so good...you have to keep it up...
8/15/2003 c1 1Luna's Meow
Update! People are witing for the next chapter!
5/16/2001 c1 3NightOwl1
Have you ever read LJ Smith's Secret Circle trilogy? Until I ran into the vampires, and kinda even after, the chacters setting and plot seeming dangerously similar to it. I think this has a lot of promise but the grammer needs a complete overhaul. It is very distracting when you forget commas and periods and such because people are trained to interpret those as pauses and without those, the reader must focus on the writing so they know how to make it sound in their head and they can't get caught up in the story. Also you need to explain things in a little more detail, give people (like your antagonist - the "bad guy") more reason for the things they are doing, motive beyond you've deceided that person is mean. Why are they mean? How do they show this in little ways, Stuff like that. Once you've deceided that, I think this will be a great story.
11/11/2000 c1 j
it's interesting. Real witches aren't extra beautiful, they don't wear robes and they can be good or evil, just like normal people, but for a fantasy fic it's a cool idea.
9/17/2000 c1 Azrael
this was a very good story, i would like to see a sequel... this was the first story that use wiccan culture that i ever see...
9/2/2000 c1 Neva
What? MORE vampires? And the Book of Shadows? And, most of all, erasing people's memories? Other than those things, not a bad story at all. I really do want to see what happens next.
8/20/2000 c1 Alexis
Wow! This was awesome, I be checking back for a sequel!

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