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12/6/2004 c1 13MoriasDepths
Wow! This was really well done! In particular I liked how you revealed that the granddaughter was the planned immortal. One thought, though. If she was already thought out, designed, and created, then why was the old man going over the basic concept with someone who might destroy her out of jealousy?
1/8/2004 c1 Orithia
I really enjoyed the last parts, when they were discussing what the immortal woman would do after the fall of civilization, then of the stars, then of the universe, etc - it was very compelling. one thing that confused me and will probably drive me crazy if I don't figure it out - why was the granddaughter eating her napkin at the end?
8/15/2003 c1 2BlueFire42
I think you have a very different view to most people- u have alot more courage in your writing. One flaw i think you could improve on is the conversations, they drag on for too long- otherwise it's great

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