
1/22/2004 c1
137Ria Mala
Wow. This is seriously a creepy piece of writing. I like the descriptions of things though. Thank you for strengthening my fear of dolls. Heh.

Wow. This is seriously a creepy piece of writing. I like the descriptions of things though. Thank you for strengthening my fear of dolls. Heh.
11/4/2003 c1 killthisaccountitsdead
oh fuck me, this is ingenious. by the end of the poem my mouth was agape.
you know, i think some verses in the middle sort of dulled the godliness of this. if you maybe cut it a little shorter and made the beginning and end the main focuses of the poem it would have been even more striking, i think.
and in some places i think you put the wrong punctuation marks and it made it unclear ("She pouts, be quiet, Baby" - this sentence, for example, i just can't understand. it could have several meanings, and it seems unneeded to create such confusion at that point in the text... Anyway, there are a few more here, i suggest you look into it)
But... how dare i say something like that about such an amazing piece of literature... really, this is one of the most original, stunning things i've ever read, and i have read a lot and extensively.
oh fuck me, this is ingenious. by the end of the poem my mouth was agape.
you know, i think some verses in the middle sort of dulled the godliness of this. if you maybe cut it a little shorter and made the beginning and end the main focuses of the poem it would have been even more striking, i think.
and in some places i think you put the wrong punctuation marks and it made it unclear ("She pouts, be quiet, Baby" - this sentence, for example, i just can't understand. it could have several meanings, and it seems unneeded to create such confusion at that point in the text... Anyway, there are a few more here, i suggest you look into it)
But... how dare i say something like that about such an amazing piece of literature... really, this is one of the most original, stunning things i've ever read, and i have read a lot and extensively.
4/19/2003 c1
16Voodoo Fyrefly
reading this i was struck with a sense of beautiful melancholy...it's twisted, yet beautiful at the same time (i hate to re-use words, but 'beautiful' really hits the nail on the head') i love the nursery rhyme feel and the twisting of old childhood mottoes...'patience is a virtue'...absolutely fantastic
~TIO

reading this i was struck with a sense of beautiful melancholy...it's twisted, yet beautiful at the same time (i hate to re-use words, but 'beautiful' really hits the nail on the head') i love the nursery rhyme feel and the twisting of old childhood mottoes...'patience is a virtue'...absolutely fantastic
~TIO
3/19/2003 c1 toysoldier
oh, beautiful, beautiful and so utterly creepy, but that's why I like it. You have a way with language, you really take on the characters in your poems, and use the right kind of words for the situation.
I'll come back later...
T.S.
oh, beautiful, beautiful and so utterly creepy, but that's why I like it. You have a way with language, you really take on the characters in your poems, and use the right kind of words for the situation.
I'll come back later...
T.S.
12/31/2002 c1 Scurvy Kat
Good lord, that goes beyond horror. Beautiful, in a wince-inducing sort of way. I got the chills reading that,and even though it was short, it was long enough to really unnerve me. To put it bluntly, it was one of the best things I've read. Simply fantastic!
Good lord, that goes beyond horror. Beautiful, in a wince-inducing sort of way. I got the chills reading that,and even though it was short, it was long enough to really unnerve me. To put it bluntly, it was one of the best things I've read. Simply fantastic!
11/28/2002 c1 Malficient
-YOU- are perfect. This poem is too, btw. going on my favourite's list, when i've managed to sign in. Spine-chilling and largely disturbing, with a sad touch to the end where you hinted at the reasons for the girl's dementia.
Most of all, you made it sound exactly how a lunatic would. A child-lunatic. The very idea is amazing itself. I shudder to think of how you would frighten more readers should you ever try to embellish the gore in this poem.
Good piece of work. Write more.
-YOU- are perfect. This poem is too, btw. going on my favourite's list, when i've managed to sign in. Spine-chilling and largely disturbing, with a sad touch to the end where you hinted at the reasons for the girl's dementia.
Most of all, you made it sound exactly how a lunatic would. A child-lunatic. The very idea is amazing itself. I shudder to think of how you would frighten more readers should you ever try to embellish the gore in this poem.
Good piece of work. Write more.
11/6/2002 c1 Mazianz39
Wow... that is just very disturbing. The imagery of it scares me. The next to last paragraph is really nice (if that's the word to describe it); it has a surreal kind of feel to it.
Wow... that is just very disturbing. The imagery of it scares me. The next to last paragraph is really nice (if that's the word to describe it); it has a surreal kind of feel to it.
9/16/2002 c1
55Carmilla
*shivers* Beautiful. Beautiful and terrible and just real enough to believe. I particularly like the way the next-to-last stanza is unpunctuated so that you can feel the beginning of her panic. I'll have this stuck in my head for weeks, I can tell. Brilliant.

*shivers* Beautiful. Beautiful and terrible and just real enough to believe. I particularly like the way the next-to-last stanza is unpunctuated so that you can feel the beginning of her panic. I'll have this stuck in my head for weeks, I can tell. Brilliant.
6/24/2002 c1 Ellan
Damned freaky. Now I'm REALLY gonna get them nightmares.
And have I told you that you're great at this? Maybe you should try more horror-based poetry or stories.
Damned freaky. Now I'm REALLY gonna get them nightmares.
And have I told you that you're great at this? Maybe you should try more horror-based poetry or stories.
6/6/2002 c1
16tash
I think I'm gonna get nightmares again m'dear. The images that's been imprinted on me is ... *shudder* You know what I mean ...

I think I'm gonna get nightmares again m'dear. The images that's been imprinted on me is ... *shudder* You know what I mean ...
5/25/2002 c1
1Raining
*breathes* Chillingly beautiful and macabre. The idea is coolly laid out, and the images well-written. I love the lines "stab shadows through their hearts least they linger by your/
feet and impede you." The ending is neat and effective. This is definitely going on my list of favourites!

*breathes* Chillingly beautiful and macabre. The idea is coolly laid out, and the images well-written. I love the lines "stab shadows through their hearts least they linger by your/
feet and impede you." The ending is neat and effective. This is definitely going on my list of favourites!
5/22/2002 c1 Alision
Horrific, but superb. This is a great piece of work, eerie and chilling.
The images of gore are perfectly written.
Subtle, leaving room for the reader's imagination.
Horrific, but superb. This is a great piece of work, eerie and chilling.
The images of gore are perfectly written.
Subtle, leaving room for the reader's imagination.
5/20/2002 c1
1Trista Anne
I... I don't know what to say. The mind brings so many images to play. The end...I have no words to justify this poem and the so many meanings it makes me think of. Amazing Scarr... simply amazing.

I... I don't know what to say. The mind brings so many images to play. The end...I have no words to justify this poem and the so many meanings it makes me think of. Amazing Scarr... simply amazing.
5/20/2002 c1 Clara2
*shivers* beautifully terrifying and breathtakingly amazing. i worship you, scarr.
*shivers* beautifully terrifying and breathtakingly amazing. i worship you, scarr.
5/20/2002 c1 Carter Tachikawa-not logged in
Lovely and kind of chilling (to me anyway). I have to keep this short since I'm on a neighbor's computer and my own computer died on me. Beautiful poetry, I look forward to more.~CT
Lovely and kind of chilling (to me anyway). I have to keep this short since I'm on a neighbor's computer and my own computer died on me. Beautiful poetry, I look forward to more.~CT