for Past to Present1/14/2003 c1 
98Little Dark Rosebud
I like this one. Most interesting. I dunno why it interest me so much. Cheers any ways.
98Little Dark RosebudI like this one. Most interesting. I dunno why it interest me so much. Cheers any ways.
11/15/2002 c1 Topher
This looks as if you put much thought and time into it. That's what makes a poem/story so good, thought and time. It shows you are really passionate about what you are writing. This is really great Kari, just like everything else you write.
This looks as if you put much thought and time into it. That's what makes a poem/story so good, thought and time. It shows you are really passionate about what you are writing. This is really great Kari, just like everything else you write.
11/10/2002 c1 ShireElf
Well done! This was a very beautiful poem! It looks like this took a long time and hard work. Excellent! ^_^
Well done! This was a very beautiful poem! It looks like this took a long time and hard work. Excellent! ^_^
7/18/2002 c1 294Newkirk's Heroes
Very well written!
The repetition in the last stanza is really effective, and the word choice is quite vivid. My favorite line would be:
"Swords sparkled silver
Now they are streaked red
Coated with life which once flowed
Through an enemy"
Wonderful poem!
294Newkirk's HeroesVery well written!
The repetition in the last stanza is really effective, and the word choice is quite vivid. My favorite line would be:
"Swords sparkled silver
Now they are streaked red
Coated with life which once flowed
Through an enemy"
Wonderful poem!
5/25/2002 c1 1Sick Little Fiend
0_0 Oooh... that was amazing! I don't even really like poetry usually, but I loved that! It was so sad... *sniffle*
1Sick Little Fiend0_0 Oooh... that was amazing! I don't even really like poetry usually, but I loved that! It was so sad... *sniffle*
5/22/2002 c1 17Jade6
This is so beautifully sad... very powerful... I loved the lines:
Swords sparkled silver
Now they are streaked red
Coated with life which once flowed
Through an enemy
Those lines were brilliant... another great poem!
17Jade6This is so beautifully sad... very powerful... I loved the lines:
Swords sparkled silver
Now they are streaked red
Coated with life which once flowed
Through an enemy
Those lines were brilliant... another great poem!
5/22/2002 c1 Liller
good. ok, critiquing first. i think that the conclusion is a bit weak and there could be some more commas, and you play with the mud/blood thing a little too much. (don't beat a dead horse). what is the "this happens now" line about? i don't understand that line.
the subject is amazing and, for the most part, your language is beautious. "coated with life..." such a picture! and also "crystal ice." nice job!
good. ok, critiquing first. i think that the conclusion is a bit weak and there could be some more commas, and you play with the mud/blood thing a little too much. (don't beat a dead horse). what is the "this happens now" line about? i don't understand that line.
the subject is amazing and, for the most part, your language is beautious. "coated with life..." such a picture! and also "crystal ice." nice job!