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11/8/2003 c10 wow
omg!

story is going GREAT! everything is good good good!

well..no offence..i dun like that john dude..well..not at the moment..

newayz..whos the voice!

u hafta write more! because we dun noe who he is!
8/23/2003 c10 5TheCrystalMaiden
Woah, it just sorta stopped... sry I took so long getting to this, I haven't had much time lately. Awesome Possum! I love this chapter, please hurry and post the next, this story just keeps getting better and better. All this suspense on who the eyes belong to is really getting to me. *Grins.* I'm taking a break of critiquing today, not that I could find anything wrong, so don't be scared that I didn't point anything out. Hehe, love ya!

-C.M.
8/21/2003 c10 Miya
I'm looking foward to see what you have planned for this story. It'll be interesting to see more of how the dreams are affecting Jerica in real life. Keep it up :)
8/16/2003 c10 1CardMaster
I guess I missed the posting of the previous chapter. Anyways, great chapters(parts, whichever) Could you make it clearer who, at this point, is good or bad? Or if there is no good or bad people except for the freaky guy in her dream?
8/15/2003 c10 3Platinum Dreams
Lessee... about your pulls... I like John, he seems to be that kind of honest, nice guy who just wants a nice, honest girl. We all love the bad boys, but you know, you can't have them in every story or it gets kinda redundant
8/14/2003 c9 5TheCrystalMaiden
The plot is progressing perfectly, darling! I mean, you have just the right mixture of suspense and action that keeps me begging for more - and now I really am wondering, "Just who is this strange guy?" Hehehe, to tell the truth, he's not so much frightening as tantalizing, but maybe that's because I don't know who he is yet. So yeah, don't worry, if the plot was doing weird things I'd be the one to tell you :D

Love this story, love your writing, don't be diheartened! *Hugz*
8/8/2003 c1 10starsprinkles9604
Hello! I'm on a guest computer, and I can't stay long. I would have read your work sooner, but I was at Girls State in my state for the past eight days so, I haven't seen a phone or computer in a LONG time. I thought I was gonna go nuts! Well anyway, you know what I think is so cool about this first chapter?

Jerica.

That is such an awesome name. It's so original! I'm glad her sister dropped her head in shame. She freakin deserved it! :-) Well anyway, I have to get going now. I'm very much curious about this dream that her thrashing around. I should get home in a few hours, but then I'm leaving for the American Idol concert in Atlanta with a friend of mine, so only God knows when I'll get back to read some more. Probably Monday or something like that.

Good good chapter, lots of great descriptions but not so many that the readers get bogged down. To have a balance like that rocks to the moon.

Well...I gotta go. Keep on Writing! It's goin on the fav's!
8/7/2003 c8 19phorc
I'm going to take your word on the getting-better bit. This chapter was slow.

Poll One: John's cool enough. There's nothing wrong with him personally. I personally think he's being misconstrued through Jerica's constant confusion with everything.

Poll Two: Romance? No, unless it's very much downplayed and kept very realistic. Under no circumstances will I tolerate sappiness! (Especially in a story found in the Supernatural section.)

The coolness is fading. Kick the story back into gear and see if you can't scare or surprise us a bit.

-AJ
8/5/2003 c8 1CardMaster
I'm sorta confused by all the wierd stuff, but it'll probably get clearer later. This is good. I'm not sure if i like John. The story looks like it will include some romance already, but I guess romance would be good.
8/4/2003 c1 LifeWhiteDragon
Hmm...Well, it's not bloody bad, but there are some inconsistencies and ideas that make me wanna beat my computer screen. First, no one is perfect enough to not mock their little sibling for urinating in her sleep. Second, I've had dreams exactly the flaming same as the one she had; the falling dream, where you wake up after you trip and endlessly fall...you know what I'm talking about. Its not Dickens, but its a good start.
8/4/2003 c8 Dan
Well, these two chapters certainly got me back into it. After the first chapter, I don't know, it just felt awkward. It didn't flow very well.

No, I don't like John. I don't care if there is romance or not as long as it doesn't become just a sappy love story.
8/4/2003 c8 5TheCrystalMaiden
This chapter was NOT pointless, there is a point in everything you write even if it is just a boring conversation between friends. I mean, you never know when later on you find that you can tie something in to what happened before (it's amazing how many times that happens to me in my stories. Half the time all my funny coincidences are purely accidental.) And yes, I like John. . . but I think it would be way cool if someone with golden eyes really did show up at the school and start stalking Jerica... haha, but that's if I was writing the story, and I'm NOT, so you can surprise me.

I like John, but at the moment he seems to be kinda faceless, ya know? No real personality has shown through yet, but then again we've just met him, so I'm sure you'll expand on him later. And YES, this story should include romance! Romance is what makes the world go round, mwahaha... ha... *cough*

So the answer to your poll is "yes" to both questions. Love this story, love your writing, don't leave me hangin!
8/3/2003 c7 Miyu
The dreamtimes are my favorite chapters in this. I'd like to see what else makes Jerica so different other than the fact that she doesn't accept a date to a guy that everyone loves. Other than that, great job and update now :)
8/3/2003 c7 TheCrystalMaiden
Majorly creepy this time... I got chills... dude who is this guy? GAH! Glad to see you updated, I really do love this story... :) Hurry up and post more, this is absolutely fascinating, I can't wait for the next part!

I'm putting you on my Favorite Stories list cuz I haven't gotten around to it yet, lol. Cya.
8/1/2003 c6 TheCrystalMaiden
"I'm not most girls"? Just what are you getting at? O the suspense, I really do love this story. At first it looked a bit weird and choppy, but now I'm settling into the rhythm and I can't wait for the next part! Who do the mysterious golden eyes belong to? Gah! Hurry up and post more so I can read. -.-
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