A/N: okay.. I really have no idea how this is going to turn out, but anyway.. Enjoy?


Chapter 5: feelings


I practically flew down the hallway to the doors leading to the fresh outside. My tongue tasted the freshness, the rejuvenating sense of the surroundings, just after the heavy downpour. What came over me, I didn't exactly want to know. However, only one thought dominated all others in my mind. I needed to feed. Simple as that. Nothing else like WHERE or HOW appeared in my screwed up mind. I had ran out of school and into the Holden Forest which was like the nearest place I could think of which could actually provide something useful to me.

As if all planned, or perhaps following a certain step, I found myself sniffing out scents in the air. This wasn't my body. Or rather, I wasn't controlling it. I was tucked somewhere at the back of my head, seeing everything, thinking but unable to control my own damned body. I crouched, lying low to the ground, sniffing something out, unmistakably a rabbit. My mind, apparently, was clear enough to recognize it or maybe it was just too familiar to forget. My muscles tensed, all ready to spring and pounce upon my meal. A flash of furry white fur appeared, racing through the fallen leaves. I snarled, and my muscles relaxed as I pounced on the unsuspecting victim. Grasping it tightly with my fingers around its neck I lowered my mouth and the long canine teeth sprouted, growing to its full length, a dead give-away for anyone who just happened to be there. Those gleaming, unnaturally sharp pointed teeth sank into the skin of the rabbit, going past the fur and layer of skin to meet the blood vessels, running through its body. It struggled in vain, thrusting its small insignificant mass of a body desperately, trying to wring itself out of my clasp. I didn't kill it before I drank its blood. I didn't want to. It would taste sweeter, more full of life, more zest, it were not dead. It was inhuman and I knew that, yet, it didn't stop me. It never did.

When I had my fill, the rabbit lay limp, lifeless, dead, in my hands. Without giving any thought to it, I tossed the thing away, flinging it over my shoulder, indifferent to whatever anyone thought. Why should I? After all, I DID have an advantage over mortal beings. I was faster in all aspects of the word, my senses were sharpened to such an extent that the humans had no chance of surviving any attack I were to make on them. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand tasting once more, the blood which stained my pale smooth skin. I could feel my canine teeth returning once more to their original state. Everything was back to normal. As normal as it could get anyway. My thoughts were no longer riveted onto the one thing- feeding. However, I knew that the little the rabbit could provide could not sustain me until dinner time. I would have to prowl the woods again and a cold unnerving smile spread on my face as I hurried back to the school.

*:*:*Careen's POV*:*:*

What the HELL just happened? Darius just knocked into Ms. Fleura and rushed off into who-knows-where. Okay, fine. It COULD have been the toilet but..STILL.. Who knows.. A few seconds after Darius left, I saw a couple of boys acting oh-so-concerned about the curvaceous teacher. Oh yeah.. they were such gentlemen.. so worried about her. Hah. Like I could be bothered what were to happen to her. It would just mean one less teacher to worry about.

"Whoosh!" The dark brown door opened, letting in a gust of wind, running a chill down our backs. Darius walked in. Was it just me or did he just change? His eyes, no longer having an unfocused and rather insane look in them were now more.. steady, more focused. I frowned slightly, his lips had a tinge of red on them. Funny.. I knew his lips had always been red but.. never THIS red. Deep red. Like blood. He ran his pale pink tongue over his upper lip, and a flash of satisfaction came into his eyes. It was gone almost instantly though. Was I imagining things? Shaking my head, swooning girls came into my vision. My expression was one of disgust.. Sure, I mean, I might think he's good-looking and all that, but SWOON? That was sooo not me. It literally disgusted me. Only one thought came to my mind - air- headed bimbos.

Soon enough, Ms. Fleura handed out the scripts to those involved. I was, in actual fact, quite pleased with the fact that I was one of them. My role might not be anything major but, hey, it DID give me something to do.. other than painting the backdrop or being in the backstage crew.. My painting was HOPELESS and my being in the backstage crew would most probably complicate matters further for the whole production.. the mikes would probably go missing or the sound system would be spoilt..blahdiblahdiblah.. Shaking my head, I emptied it of the weird thoughts forming which strangely enough, depicted me playing the role of a not so innocent kid in front of Ms. Fleura who was yelling her head of at me for some reason or other. Hell, anything from painting the backdrop was fine.

I looked around the cast, having seated in a circle to practise our lines. Darius was staring at the script in an agonized or rather, a no-I-don't- want-to-do-this look. The others? Practically the opposite of that - either the excited little squeals coming from the girls, flushed with pleasure of being chosen or the guys acting uninterested at first but now, reading the scripts with undisguised curiosity. Happily, I flipped through my own script, quickly lost to the world around me as I drank down the words of the play.

*:*:*: Darius' POV*:*:*:

Well, now.. the play. What a nice little cast for me to be part of, eh? Ooh.. how exciting.., I thought dryly as I glanced around. I had no desire to be part of this. In fact, I would GLADLY give my place away to some other idiot who would like my damn part. Yeah, my DAMNNED part. The role of a vampire, damned to living hell. I could feel my anger searing up in me. WHO the hell wrote this? Who would actually know what it felt like to be one? Hah.. No one would know, unless they WERE one, which I highly doubt it. Who gave THEM the frigging authority to write about us? What did they know about hell's angels themselves? Nothing. Yeah.. all they knew was the pain we inflicted on others. Us, the blood-sucking creatures who hunted at night, who are at the mercy of sunlight. Oh yeah, they knew about the suspense, the horror involved when producing a vampire show. But, that's about all. How limited was that.

Did they even SENSE the agony consuming us? The pain WE ourselves feel when inducing mortal wounds on others. I myself had no control over what I did when overwhelmed with hunger. They didn't think of what we feel. Oh wait. They probably thought we were so inhuman and so evil so as to be totally devoid of feelings. Yeah, I admit, being a vampire DID add a few layers of ice around one's heart but we were not emotionless. We feel, perhaps less than others, perhaps we were less sensitive to others but we DO feel. I could feel the agony, the pain, the horror of my victim, human or not, whenever life was being drawn out from it, mixing with my own. I didn't want to kill. I didn't. but I couldn't stop myself and I never did. I hated myself for being who I was. I had no one to blame but, my parents. Each time I fed, the horror, the deep loathing I felt for myself filled me, threatening to explode.

With pursed lips, I scanned the script, each line filling me with dread. As expected, I was the cold-blooded murderer whom everyone loathed. I was the repulsive damned thing that had to be gotten rid of. The one everyone wanted to kill. As if my head were worth something. like what? Ooh.. a poster on the wall claiming that whoever who got my head would receive a reward? Something DID catch my eye, however. At the end of the script, it was written that the best actor or actress would receive a mystery gift. I had no doubt who it was going to be - some popular kid who would catch the eye of every single person of the opposite sex. Cliché? Might be, but hell, it WAS true. Usually, anyway.

I sighed in exasperation. If I had to be part of this, just get ON with it. MOVE.. I didn't want to wait here for eternity. I saw several heads swivel to glare at me.. oh please.. you're not really interested are you? Oh wait- you probably are. Well FINE, I'll just sit back and wait for all of you to be done with the damn thing. In the mean time, I'd probably just sleep or something. Ms. Fleura caught me, however, and in the sickening syrupy voice asked me if I had enough sleep. Oh, her concern for me touched me so. Yeah, sure, did I LOOK as if I had enough sleep? I let out another sigh..

It was going to be a long day ahead..


Sigh.. I really didn't know what to say. I'm suffering from writer's block. Aaah.. I know that wasn't very good but oh well.. r&r please?