This is a slight variation on my other fic, Mainstream Lament: YGO Division. Both versions are differing from eachother in that this one focuses more on anime in general, while ML: YGO Division is more about YuGiOh.

The bit about YGO, and the last verse of this fic, are the same as in ML: YD, with a few minor changes. The YGO one also has more verses about YGO (obviously). Other than that, everything else is new, so it's not the same as posting the same entry twice (if you don't believe me, check out ML: YGO Division. They aren't the same at all).


I actually don't mind dubs or censorship most of time (as long as it isn't too overboard), but this is for those who do. Purists are cool! WOOO- snippy!


Mainstream Lament


When East meets West, then cultures clash

Sub versus dub, the fans or the cash

It's obvious which one the distributors will choose

And it's a hopeless war for purists, cuz I'm sure they're gonna lose


Satoshi's friendly Pikachu gave a crowd of kids a seizure

Was it this that sparked the popularity of America's Poke-fever?

Takeshi was a pervert; the cross-changing wrecked havoc

The Americans put a stop to Kojiro's un-Western habit

The show was full of cultural references, the modern and the old

Despite this culture gap, the merchandise still sold

But the second season was tainted with the West's toned-down cartoons

The fad dropped off and the Poke-master took his dues

Pokemon continues on its sad, dejected way

Its legacy is being sold for next to nothing on eBay


Sailor Moon had lesbians which the censors couldn't abide

Some sex-changes were made so that parents wouln't run and hide

Relationships were mutilated, and now the lovers aren't in love

And Bunny is a brat with a voice that says enough (enough! Enough!)

Naked ladies in the shower are definitely not allowed

Upon bare skin and nudity the distributors scowled

They cut it out and mashed it up until the show was a disgrace

Then they gave it to the fans who chewed it up and made a face


Yugi Mutou gets beat up on an average five times a day

And Shonen Jump had integrity not to censor what they say

Honda is a friend whose character development was a dud

And Yami Bakura rigged the ratings with his morbid taste for blood

Mokuba's mouth was dirty; this the dubber's didn't keep

The swearing didn't make it with the translation's leap

Yugi's dark side liked sharp objects, with which he cleaned the bully's clock

The scene was cut out entirely and now the purists are in shock

Most villains were driven crazy by Yami Yugi's mental games

But the distributors didn't like this, and now the show's just not the same


Escaflowne died without a whimper or ceremony

And Yusuke and Tenchi you can see on special late nights only

Beyblade and Hamtaro are the mainstream face of doom

Those shows make some want to completely annihilate the room

Dragonball was funny but DBZ it leaves me hissing

The distributors made their cuts and now half the show is missing


This guy is a pervert, this girl's skirt was hitched

She punched him in the face, and in the dub this was a glitch

Potty mouths were removed and second seasons they were tamed

While the purists rose up in protest, for the dubbers had no shame

Professional Japanese seiyuu were replaced by random hoarse-voiced hacks

The original music was inspired, but now techno fills the soundtracks

Names are changed to fit the world of McDonalds and pop-pollution

'Ash Ketchum' was enough to get the purists set for revolution


And still the visions haunt us, the ghost of a Might-Have-Been

In which the war of censorship was merely a bad dream

And subbers can roam the streets, forever wild and free...

But despite online petitions, I guess it's just not meant to be.

~The Bitter End~