Things a wife should say.

By

Son Of Evil

I'll swallow it all.I love the taste.

Are you sure you've had enough to drink?

I'm bored. Let's shave all my crotch!

Shouldn't you be down the pub with your mates?

That was a great fart! Do another one!

I've decided to stop wearing clothes around the house.

You're so sexy when you've got a hangover.

8. I'd rather watch football and drink beer with you than go shopping.

9. Let's subscribe to Husler.

10. Would you like to watch me have sex with a lesbian?

11. Say, lets go down town so you can look at women's arses'.

12. I'll be out painting the house.

13. I love it when you play golf on Sunday's, I just wish you had time to play on Saturday too. (Golf was the first thing to mind which is weird 'cos I hate golf)

14. new neighbour's daughter is sun bathing again, come see!

15. I know it's a lot tighter back there, but would you please try again?

16. No, no, I'll take the car to have the oil changed.

17. Your mother is way better than mine.

18. Do me a favour, forget the stupid Valentine's thing and buy yourself some new clubs.

19. I understand anniversary comes every year for Christ's sake, you go hunting with the lads, it's a

wonderful stress reliever (A/N: I'm against this in real life)

20. Oh come on, what do ya say we get a good porno movie, a rack of beer, a few joints, and have my friend Tammy over for a threesome!

21. Christ, not the fucking mail again, come on let's go to that new strip joint!

22. Listen, I make enough money for both of us why don't you retire and get that nagging handicap down to 7 or 8.

23. You need your sleep, ya big silly, now stop getting up for the night feeding.

24. God, if I don't get to blow you soon, I swear I'm gonna bust!

25. I sighed up for aerobics so that I can get my ankles behind my head for ya.

That was one for the lads. Now I'll write one for the girls. Remember, this is only comedy, people! REVIEW!