Daddy
It was a foggy day, as foggy days will go

The wind was biting fierce, the rain felt rough as snow

It stung the cheeks, it bit the nose

Sank into my stomach, right down to my toes.

He was standing there, the man that I hate

Incarnate and evil, seeping with bait

Trying to bribe me, it seemed with his eyes

Trying to trick me, that one I despise.

I knew he was evil, I told my heart

But I knew that I loved him, loved from the start.

He hurt me, he touched me the way that he shouldn't

Made me weak, made me hurt, made me feel like I couldn't.

I wasn't enough, I never had been.

She said I was coming, he'd simply asked when.

He'd bottled that day, promised he'd hurt me

Promised to ruin that girl that I could be

Promised she'd be lonely, pathetic and weak

Ugly and wretched, nose like a beak

Obese and ignored, depressed and scared

Never the true proud woman he bared

Never the girl that stands out in the crowd

Not because she's gaudy, or mouthy or loud

But because she stands silent, hard and withdrawn

Standing so still as if watching the dawn

Knowing that somewhere, deep deep inside

Lay dormant the ugly, the failures she'd tried

Lay hidden away the pain she'd endured

The wounds and the scars that never had cured

The hatred, the evil, the marks he had made

Those blood tainted memories she wished she could trade

Those nights of tears, the bed which she'd laid

Remembering the last night of her life she had prayed

Praying that out there somebody cared

Somebody knew, somebody shared

but deep down inside, she knew that she hoped

that no one endure those things she had coped

And so I stood strong, watching him weep

Watching him pretend it was me that he seeked

When it was consolence, forgiveness and love

Not from me, but more from above

For he was going, and this we both knew

And he had forgotten me and time as I grew

That love and forgiveness were as fickle as the wind

As thin as grass, as it would tussle and bend

And I looked in his eyes and I saw that small girl

The shiny blonde hair, heart like a pearl

Innocent and ready to feel his embrace

For his first touch, for his love's first taste

To know in her heart, as she lay down at night

That if she awakened, he'd hold her tight

Let her know what he felt when he saw her small form

Let her know that he loved her, the day she was born

But there he stood empty and I turned away

Tears pouring down as my hips began to sway

Knowing in my heart, that'd be the last time

That opening myself wouldn't feel like a crime

But that girl was gone and I was her daughter

Hard and cold, no footstep would totter

Beautiful and crazy, harsh and fierce

Not one male heart that I couldn't pierce

For I'll hate them all till the day that I die

Push them away the harder they try

Laugh in vain, at those tears that they cry

Tell them I hate them, even if it's a lie

For what does it matter when my love is gone

Why pretend that my heart still beats on

And if they ask why, I won't even bother

For they'll never know what its like... to love my father.